Friday, October 05, 2007

Depression is Boring

Several years ago, I went on a women's retreat with some ladies from my church in Texas. The guest speaker talked about different personality types, which she saw in her study of Scripture. It was a fascinating talk that blended together two of my favortie topics: psychology and theology.

As I tuned in to figure out what my personality type was according to her breakdown, it didn't take me long to recognize myself in one of her personality descriptions. My type was described as viewing life as an ongoing celebration. The catch-phrase question that my type asks is: Are we connecting yet? And I remember her saying that my type doesn't stay depressed for too long, because it's just too boring.

I can totally see the truth in that. Relationships and connecting with others is a top priority for me. Friends and acquaintances often describe me as effervescent. And as for the depression part...well, I don't stay depressed for too long, but that doesn't mean I don't get depressed.

I think part of having a creative temperment includes having a streak of melancholy in my personality. Lately, things just haven't been moving forward the way I hoped they would career-wise. I'm still not working a day job, which is a huge blessing in that it enables me to devote time to finding the acting work I long for. I'm just in a slow season, and I don't quite know what to do about it. Thankfully, I've had two good meetings this week with friends in "the industry" who have given me some good ideas, and that is kicking some of the melancholy out the door. Just having a vision and something to focus my energy on to make me feel like I'm taking baby steps forward is a joy and a blessing, indeed.

It's just that this slow season is lasting longer than I thought it would, so the depressed feelings are lingering longer than I want them too. True to my personality type, I'm about tired of feeling the "blahs"... just so boring!!!

So, to combat the drearies, I'm going to make a list of things I have to be thankful for:

1. My wonderful husband! God sure gave me a good man. I really love being married, and especially being married to Hubs!!!

2. Jen Disney -- my new friend from church who took some great character headshots of me this week! We also hung out and enjoyed some peanut butter cup ice cream and a chick flick.

3. Our Sunday school class. We have met some really cool couples in our "young married" class at church.

4. My acting class is a weekly shot of creative juice!

5. I have a great family whom I love and who loves me. I was just talking to my mom today about how my sister is also my best friend. :)

6. My other "bestie"-- Ad! Not too mention many other fabulous friends. :)

7. You guys! Do you know how much you mean to me, dear blog buddies? Seriously, your supportive comments are so encouraging! Thank you for being in my life.


J at said...

I don't think anyone would ever describe me as effervesent (though, you? Yes. :) ) but I don't spend much time being down either. I'm more of an even keel type person. Being depressed IS boring, and I can't spend too much time there. From talking to my friends who suffer from real depression, I would say they totally agree, and wish they could turn it off as easily as you or I can.

I like your list. It's great to remember what we have to be thankful for. I saw something the other day that said that remembering your blessings is a great way to have a happy life. Like, two people with the same situations can have a totally different perception of it...nice.

Autumn's Mom said...

You have a very uplifting personality and i like how it seems to rub off on others, like me! I find now that I've been happy, when I do get depressed, I find it boring and want to get back to the happy. So I just do :)

I'm going to remember more often to be thankful for who I am and the blessings in my life.

Have a great weekend Tracy and hubs!

Starshine said...


I totally agree with you. Serious depression is no laughing matter, and I know that those who struggle with it do not choose it and would like nothing more than to return to a genuine place of happiness.


Anonymous said...

I like that your catch-phrase question is: "are we connecting yet?" That seems so appropriate for someone in acting. Maybe when you're feeling depressed you're just connecting with something different inside you and that's how it's supposed to be in that moment. Until it gets too boring, of course-- then you move on. Very interesting.

Sometimes Emma said...

I'd like to say something stellar and witty but I'm a blank slate...

Not a real slate, cause they don't talk (duh).

As for blogger peops..yes, they are indeed the best.

(ps. thanks for the Bachelor Recap linky!)

Jennifer Disney said...

Awwwwww! I'm thankful for you too! I've found another musical theater kindred spirit! Thanks for the shout out!