Wednesday, January 09, 2008

I'd Better Get to Livin'

As I sit to write this post, I realize that it is the first time I've really written anything for awhile. Re-approaching the keyboard to write something feels familiar and new all at once. I feel like a composer ready to write a song, but I'm not quite sure yet what the melody will be. Here goes...

It's a wierd time to be an actor. The writer's strike is still going, so production of most scripted television and virtually all studio movies is indefinitely on hold. In a time when I'd like to feel some momentum career-wise, all is quiet. It feels a like I'm on the 5 during rush hour, but there are no other cars on the highway. This is the season when I'm not working a day job so that I can make a "big push" for my career, devoting all my time and energy to finding acting work.

Needless to say, I'm feeling a little bit useless. I started feeling a little depressed on Monday with the realization that the holidays are officially over. It's time to be "out there finding work". *crickets*

I suppose that there is an upside to all this, though, right? When things slow down in "the industry", it's a good time for me to look at myself and get my "stuff" in order so that when things pick up, I'll be ready and in a good place.

For the last few months, I've been thinking about what I can do to generate my own momentum (above and beyond the usual daily stuff of submitting myself for auditions online). I have heard and read about people who are creating their own videos (of the 3-5 minute variety) and putting them on YouTube where they have found audiences and interest in their work. All this has made me think that I would like to buy a video camera and make some videos of my own characters. I like this idea for a few reasons:

-Regardless of what happens, I will feel true meaning in my days because I'll be proactively doing something for my career. I will be working my craft--growing and creating and sharing my work with an audience.

-It will kick fear and feelings of uselessness in the butt. I think that so much of what holds me back is plain old fear. Fear of rejection. Fear of not being good enough. The usual suspects. Making my own videos and putting them "out there" will be an awesome way to be acting before the world that I'm dying to entertain. And the great thing about video blogging and posting videos on YouTube is the comments section that allows you to interface with your viewers. If the comments are critical, I'll be able to integrate that criticism into my craft and produce even better work. If the comments are positive, I will know that I'm on the right track and integrate the confirmation of the things I am doing right. Whatever happens, it is a way to stamp out fear, because at least I'll be doing something!

-In a best case scenario, I could be discovered. I have heard from and read industry sources that say that many agencies now have hired people whose sole purpose is to scour the internet for new talent. Making my own videos will be a way to put myself into the marketplace. It will be something to feel good about!

It sounds like a good plan. Now I have the big task of deciding what camera to buy. I'm not too well-versed in this. I don't want to buy a cheapy camcorder that will yield low production values, but I don't want to buy something so professional that I won't know how to work it. I'd like to buy a user-friendly professional-grade camera.

I'd like to give a special thank you to Mrs. G, who posted a Dolly Parton song on her blog today that reminded me that I'd "better get to livin'"!

I want to thank my readers who prayed with me during my month of prayer in December. It was a special thing to participate in with my blogging community, and anytime you ever have a prayer request, feel free to write it in my comments section, and I'll pray for you. This idea I have to move forward with producing my own videos is high on my prayer request list. I'd sincerely appreciate your prayers for God's guidance. Please also continue to pray for my Dad's healing from cancer. Thank you!


josey said...

starshine!! first, i have to say that i, too, hadn't really "written" in my blog for a while. funny, cause i JUST finished quite a chatty post before coming to visit you! hehe!

i am feeling how you are, too. while i'm not an actor, and i do work at home a little, i've felt useless a lot i have no purpose or the yellow-brick-road has ended and im lost with no plan. hehe. fortunately some things have JUST come thru for me so now i have more to do! i have to partly thank YOU for it--i believe it was thru my persistent prayers last month! if it werent for your month of prayer, i'd still be flubbering around, not chatting with God! (okay, im still not perfect, but i'm trying!)

i think your video idea is awesome. i love your positivity and reasoning to do it! if you're not getting anywhere doin what you're doin, why not try it? i hope you let us know when the first one comes out, cause i cant wait to see it! i will pray for your guidance and creativity...and for that "just right" camera to pop right off the shelf at the store! hehe!

i am also praying for your dad still. please keep us updated on him. ((hug))

hope you dont mind the gabby comment! ;) my fingers are on a rampage today. LOL. have a beautiful day!

J at said...

Love the video YouTube idea! Go for it! Sorry I have no good info on video recorders. Do you have any contacts or friends who make films? They might have some good advice. Also, sometimes you can get something used for a lot less money than something new, meaning you can spend the same amount, but upgrade to something better. (Did that even make sense?) I bought a camera that way once, through a local camera shop, and it's been great. :)

Starshine said...

Josey - Yea for the new work coming your way. PTL! Thank you for your prayers and for the ((hugs))!

J - Thanks for the encouragement. I do have a friend who is a videographer and she has pointed me to some websites to help me make a camera decision! Yea!

Irish Goddess said...

I know just what you mean about feeling listless while looking for a job. I sit in front of the computer for hours, looking at ads, submitting applications and resumes, and it can get you down. The best thing to do is just what you are doing: something proactive that you are able to do while you have the time, and will benefit you in the long run. I don't pray in any traditional way, but I sure will keep you in my prayers - and your dad. Take care! I can't wait to see your video when it's done.

ALF said...

I've also heard that the youtube video is a good way to go. Best of luck!

Mrs. G. said...

Can I just tell you HOW GREAT I think these ideas are? I was just telling someone the other day that there should be some sort of internet soap opera...perhaps you can turn your blog into a performance piece. Oh, come on, Starshine, DO IT!

Sharon said...

I still think you need to write that play with your songs!