Then I would have to grieve the loss of e-mail, because that was one awesome invention, and it makes it so easy to communicate with my loved ones all around the world.
Then I would take a deep breath, and I'd walk outside and see the sun shining, and I'd feel a wave of relief come over me, because I'd know in my heart that I wasted way too much time surfing around on the internet, and it was definitely time to unplug anyway.
Then I'd be like, "Say what? No more internet?"
Then I'd cry again. I can't help it...I heart the internet!