Moved by Music

Do you remember when Grey's Anatomy did their musical episode about a year ago? I loved it. And the high point of the show was the featured vocals of Sara Ramirez who plays Callie Torres. She has performed on Broadway in Spamalot, and WOW did she ROCK it on this episode of Grey's. 


In this episode, Callie is on the brink of death after being in a terrible car accident. She was pregnant at the time, and her baby had to be delivered via emergency c-section, and the baby is also in critical condition. In this song, Callie's spirit is willing her body to live. I've seen this episode three times now, and I cry like a baby every time she sings this song. It's just so good.



It's not often that I am so moved by music, so I've been pondering why this song so speaks to me. I especially love these lyrics:

All of these lines across my face,
Tell you the story of who I am.
So many stories of where I've been,
And how I got to where I am.
But these stories don't mean anything,
If you've got no one to tell them to.
It's true. I was made for you.


The lyrics made me think about my husband so much, and what a blessing it is to have someone who walks through life with me, and who (God willing) will be with me for the great majority of my journey on earth. We spend a lot of time telling our life stories to one another, and of course we are also writing part of our story together. As I talked about it with Brian, he told me about a fabulous quote spoken by Susan Sarandon in the movie Dance with Me:

We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things, all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go unwitnessed because I will be your witness.

I'm so thankful to have a wonderful husband bearing witness to my life, as well as my family members, and some dear friends. We all need witnesses, because all of us matter.

Return: To Childhood!

Yesterday, my sister and I got together with our kids and took them on a carousel ride! I can't really remember the last time I went on a merry-go-round, but it was so much fun to relive the excitement and fun and wonder through the eyes of the kids!

Return: Something to Look Back On

Today, my baby is 17 months old! During his first year, I did a photo session with him every month. Since his first birthday, I haven't been doing them every month, but he looked so cute in the outfit he was wearing this morning, I couldn't resist! Here are some of my favorites!

Return: The Opposite Of...

After returning home from the airport feeling blue, I flopped down on the bed and told Brian that I needed a hug. Goodbyes are so sad! As Brian gave me a big bear hug, I remarked that one of the best things about marriage is that it is a relationship that doesn't involve many goodbyes. Maybe for business trips here and there etc., but for the most part we just get to be together...and be together some more...for the rest of our lives! I'm thankful for that.

Life with my husband/best friend is good.

I love you, Brian!

Return: Volver

On Thursday, Rebeca (our summer nanny) will be returning to Spain to continue her university studies. What a fun summer we've had with her here! We took advantage of overcast skies and cooler temperatures today to do a photo shoot with her and the boys. Rebeca, thank you so much for all you've done for us this summer! You were wonderful with the boys and a great friend to me! We love you and will miss you so much!!!

Return: to 1977 and 2010

The top photo is of my mother in 1977. 

The bottom photo is of my sister in 2010.

Same age.

Not planned.

My mom saw the photo I took of my sister and said, 

"I think I have a photo like that of myself at her age!"

Exactly the same age!

The apple did not fall far from the tree,

and I'm glad.

Return: This Time Last Year

On this day last year, Brian and I were two days into parenthood. We were in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia falling in love with our sons! 

Two days earlier, on August 30, 2010, our sons were placed in our arms, and we were so full of joy! 

It's amazing that we've been together already for a year! This year, to celebrate one year together as a family, we had a cookie cake that said "Happy J & Z Day!"

We are so blessed to get to be parents to our wonderful sons!

The Power of a Name - Crazy Sexy Diet, Day 6

One of the side effects the author of Crazy Sexy Diet wrote that I might experience while doing the 21 Day Cleanse is feeling emotional. That has certainly been the case today. I fought back tears a couple of times before lunchtime.

This morning, I was teary thinking about my late step-dad, John. I really was missing him. He's the person who gave me the nickname Starshine, which is my favorite nickname ever.

I believe very strongly in the power of naming your child well. When we were considering names for the boys, we took into consideration both if we liked the sound of the name, as well as if we liked the meaning of the name. Somehow, it seems that the names we are given have the power to impact us, for better or for worse--not only our literal names, but also the names people call us (good and bad), and nicknames!

This morning, I was just feeling so touched by the meaning of my beloved nickname. John was such an encourager to me when it came to following my acting dreams. I'm sure that he chose the name Starshine for me, because it conjured up images of a big-time actress. He believed in the beauty of my dreams and supported me in my quest to go after them, and that has always meant so much to me. This morning, though, as I was thinking about John, I wondered what he might think about my life being on this side of my Hollywood journey. I left Hollywood never having won a big break, and certainly not having found stardom. (Although I'll be forever grateful for the myriad gifts God gave me while I was there: a husband!, an incredible acting teacher, a technique for acting on-camera, a renewed love for theatre acting, and some wonderful friends to name only a few.)

Without a doubt, John would still be proud of me. Without a doubt, I would still be his Starshine. And this morning, as I stood in this private moment, fighting back the tears, I realized that he didn't name me Starshine because he believed I would one day be a big star. He named me Starshine because he saw the light within my spirit, and he believed that I already was one.

That is the sweetest gift a father could give his daughter. My heart is filled with gratitude, and the floodgates have now let loose. Perhaps this diet isn't just cleansing my body, but also my soul.

I love Santa and other musings...

Today, I loaded the boys up in the car and drove to a local commercial retail center in town so I could rev up with some Starbucks and then take the boys for a walk in the stroller. It was a gorgeous morning, sunny and cool--perfect for a stroll. I confess that I love this time of year, when the store windows are transformed into mini holiday wonderlands. Hopeful that I'd get to see some good holiday window dressings, I strolled the boys by Kirkland's Home, and I was not disappointed. In one of their windows, there were several gorgeous framed paintings of Saint Nick--one was a regal Santa dressed in a majestic golden cloak, another depicted him with a couple of his reindeer, but the one I loved best was a rendering of Santa holding his finger up to his lips, as if to say, "Shhh! It's our little secret." I'm not sure why I loved it so much, but a wave of nostalgia washed over me, and I started to sing Christmas carols to myself.

Artwork found on Kirkland's Website

As I moseyed on, I couldn't help but think about a most strange (to me) phenomenon the exists in the Christian sub-culture: there are some who think it is wrong to incorporate Santa into one's family's Christmas celebration. Some say that it is lying to your children. Others say that it takes the focus off of Jesus, who is, after all, the Reason for the Season. And you know? I respect their decision to celebrate Christmas sans Santa, even though I don't share their view.

My family? Santa comes to our house every year!

I grew up in a family who celebrated Christmas with presents, a fresh cut tree, and yes, Santa Claus. Was I sad when I grew up and found out? Absolutely. Do I wish my parents hadn't "lied" to me? Absolutely NOT! I never felt lied to, and it made my childhood sparkle with magic. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.

I think the reason the painting of the Santa saying "Shhh!" so resonated with me is because it felt like he was saying, "We're totally getting away with something here...and it's good!" That's right! Me and Saint Nicholas?... We both believe in Jesus, and we both love to celebrate His birth in grand style!

I'm so excited to share the upcoming Christmas season with my boys!

Gustopher Jones

In the midst of becoming of mother of two, I haven't been able to dote on my newest nephew the way that he deserves. However, I got to do his three month old photo shoot, and was he ever ready for his close-up! Behold his cuteness:

We love you, little Gus!

I'm a Mom!

On August 4th, an Ethiopian judge said, "They are yours", and we became the parents of two wonderful sons!

Jeremy:

and Zachary:

We love them so much, and look forward to bringing them home in early September!

Lots more details about our trip and our boys are being posted on our adoption blog!

One Week old and Already Breaking Hearts (Well, mine that is!)

My sweet nephew Gus came over for his one week old photo shoot on Monday, and suffice it to say, the little guy has completely stolen my heart. He's so little and sweet and precious and...I could go on and on. But it would be much easier to just show you how wonderful he is. Prepare yourself, though...he might just steal your heart, too.

Brian and I are beside ourselves with glee...we're going to Ethiopia on Friday to meet our sons! Tune in to our adoption blog for updates (if we have access to the internet, that is)!

Big hugs to all!

Meet Gus!

Dear Gus,

Yesterday, your Mom texted me in the wee hours of the morning to tell me that her water broke and that she would be having a baby later in the day--and you got it...that baby was you! You made your entrance into the world at 7:06 via c-section yesterday morning, and you've been charming the world ever since!

I got to meet you just three and a half hours after you were born, and I spent the rest of the day hanging out with you and your Mom and Dad in the hospital room. We mostly stared at you and passed you around so that we could all cuddle you.

You are just precious, and I'm already in love with you. Being an aunt to your awesome big brother Sam has been one of the sweetest gifts of my life, and I'm so blessed to be your aunt now, too. I'll be here for you whenever you need me--to hang out, to talk, to pray with you or whatever!

You can be sure that I've got a heart full of auntie love for you, and I'm blessed and honored to be a part of your life's journey. May God bless you and this beautiful life He's given you, Gus!

All my love,

Tia

Uncle and Nephew

Sam came over to our house on Saturday. He and Brian were dressed alike, and they didn't even plan it! I guess great men have great fashion sense and that's all there is to it!

It was so adorable seeing the two of them swinging next to each other on the swing set. I'm not sure who had the most fun!

Based on the smiles on their faces, I think it was a tie!