Happy Halloween!!!

Captain Jack and Wonder Woman went to a Halloween dance party on Friday!



Wonder Woman hasn't been able to stop thinking about the pirate since. She never found herself interested in pirates in the past. They have a reputation for being bad guys, and we all know that bad guys aren't too popular with members of the Justice League. Still, when Capt. Jack swung her around the dance floor, she discovered that his heart was noble and true. Her golden lasso of truth told her so! Wonder Woman can't wait until the next time she finds herself in the arms of Capt. Jack.

Twice Tearful

Last night, I had the wonderful experience of watching the Mojalet Dance Collective perform a modern dance piece choreographed to Mozart's Requiem. Complete with a live orchestra and choir, this live performing arts evening was truly memorable.

I found my eyes welling up with tears twice during the performance. The first time was for the same reason I almost always tear up during live performances: resonance. The live performing arts experience so resonates with my soul, I cannot help but cry. I feel a mix of pride for the artists on stage, joy that life can be experienced through the arts, and yearning for the next time that I'll get to be on a stage myself. It is what the old cowboy in City Slickers means when he talks about "the one thing". That thing that you are created for, that you were meant to do. I never feel more alive (except when I am worshipping God and in close communion with Him) than I do when I am performing. But I think perhaps that doing what you are meant to do can be an act of worship, if it is done for His glory. It is, in essence, saying "God, look what I can do with the gift you gave me! Thank You!" I think God looks back at us when we do that in the same way a proud parent looks at their child riding for the first time on their new bike with no training wheels--with radiant pride and joy.

The second time I cried was when one of the dancers I was watching moved in such a way that I was simply overcome with the beauty of the movement. It was art in motion, and I was inspired by it. In my fast-paced Los Angeles life, I rarely slow down long enough to sit still and notice the beauty all around me. To sit still for an hour and a half last night and have beauty wash over me was a lovely and soul-nourishing gift.

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Reasons Why Anne is One of My Bes Frennies!

Almost four years ago, Anne and I became friends. We worked together in Spain, and we hit it off from the get-go.

1.) She is the funniest person I know. The other day I got an e-mail from her bemoaning the fact that I wasn’t there when she made a joke before a roomful of people who didn’t laugh. She knew I would have laughed. And she was right.

2.) The great thing is, I am the funniest person that Anne knows. Not everyone thinks I’m funny. But there is something about being with Anne. She just gets my sense of humor. I guess we bring out the funny in each other.

3.) Anne taught me the “pretty feet” pose, seen in this picture (Mom, me, Anne left to right).

Anne and her sister started doing the pretty feet pose after they saw Morgan Fairchild doing this pose while shaving her legs in a movie. They just thought it was hilarious that M.F. was in the tub shaving with perfectly pointed toes. Is that funny to you too? I’m snickering just thinking about it! Anne lives all the way across the country, but every time we see each other, we invent new pretty feet poses.

4.) Anne always travels with a headlight—you know a flashlight that you wear on your head—just in case she needs it. Usually it comes in handy for doing hand puppet shows. She’s a very handy lady!

5.) Whed we’re id a silly mood, we like to talk like we have colds. That’s why she likes to comment on my blog as “Ad”, because when Anne has a cold, it’s pronounced “Ad”.

6.) We were each other’s English speaking friend in Spain, so that really helps forge a friendship.

7.) We have an annual birthday tradition. Both of us were born in the same month of the same year, so we try to meet somewhere for our b-days every year. It’s a very fun tradition, and one that I hope we can continue!

8.) She’s a smarty!

9.) We talk to each other in Dr. Evil voices. It’s truuuue. We dooooo.

10.) When in need of a good cry, I can call her.

11.) When in need of a good laugh, I can call her.

12.) When I need someone to pray for me, Annie always does.

13.) Her hair has a great personality, too!

Love you, Annie! Thaggs for beig by bes fred.

Feeling Shell-Shocked

As I have mentioned before, the mortgage industry is taking a big hit right now. The housing market is very slow, and this affects lending companies, too.

This morning, my boss “Robin” was an hour late for work. I called her on her cell phone to make sure she was okay. She was in her car, and said she’s fine. End of conversation. I hung up assuming that she’d be walking into work shortly.

A few minutes later, my dear co-worker “Ann” who is my cubicle neighbor, sent me an e-mail with the subject line “Hit by lay-off—Bye”. Indeed, she had been let go. Ugh. She is a wonderful woman. A widow raising her two grandchildren.

A few minutes after that, the big boss called me and “Maria” into her office. She informed us that “Ann” had been laid-off and that “Robin”, our boss, volunteered to be laid-off. When I had talked to her earlier this morning, she wasn’t driving into work at all. She was driving across the country, moving to her new home. I’ll miss her. She was a great woman and boss.

“Maria” and I are the last two standing in our little group. “Maria” is my new boss, and thankfully, we have a very good working relationship.

Still, it’s just so shocking that this lay-off is affecting two people who I have grown close to through my day job. I also feel very humbled that for some reason I am still here. I don’t understand it, but I’m grateful.

Stranded, But Not Alone

Today, I decided to run some headshots/resumes over to my agent's office on my lunch break. No problem! Jump in my car, drop them off, jump back in car. Be back at work all in about an hour.

NOT!!!

After dropping them off, I got back in my car, and it was acting like it didn't want to start. Actually, it would start, but it would die when I put it into gear. Finally, I was able to get it gassed and in gear. I got on the highway to head back to work, and traffic was all backed up! I made it about a mile down the highway when all the lights on my dash came on as the car. done. died. Thankfully, I was able to move across one lane and cruise onto the shoulder where my car stopped all on it's own. No brakes needed!

*crying can now commence*

Here's my little "zipper"

sittin' pretty on the shoulder.

I realized some important things in this moment:

1.) My mother is a genius. I love, love, love her and want to publically thank her for telling me to sign up for Verizon's roadside assistance offer. All I had to do was dial *ROAD, and someone was on the line and had a tow truck coming my way. Just $2/month. And today, I didn't have to pay a cent!

2.) I have a wonderful boyfriend. He is in Florida on a business trip this week, but he stayed all calm with me on the phone while I had a mini emotional meltdown. He called me between meetings and texted me during meetings to make sure that I was okay. Thanks, eSuitor, for helping me through today's car crisis from all the way across the country.

3.) God has blessed me with some fabulous friends and family. It was such a comfort to have a cell phone with numbers of people I could call to ask to pray for me when I was scared.

Once I calmed down a bit and knew that a tow truck was on the way, I decided there was no way this kind of drama would come my way without getting some photo documentation to put it on my blog.

The tow truck came and took me safely to my auto shop. Once it was unloaded at the shop, it started to behave, and they couldn't find a thing wrong with it. Go fig. The Zipper is spending the night at the shop to go through some diagnostic testing. Tomorrow they will try to figure out what the problem is. In the meantime, I'm driving a rental that I got for a very reasonable price.

Now that the day is done, and I'm home safe and sound, I want to give thanks to God for keeping me safe and for providing for my needs today. Thank You, Lord!

It's a Small World, After All!

This was a fun weekend! My good friend K and her hubby J (from Texas) were in town, so eSuitor and I joined them on Saturday for a day at Disneyland! Immediately, my kid-at-heartness bubbled right up to the surface. It's not everyday that you see Mary Poppins and Bert strolling arm-in-arm down Main Street, ya know?

We went on Space Mountain, took a "doom buggy" ride through the Haunted Mansion (which I kept wanting to call the Spooky Kooky Castle*), and we toured the Amazon on the Jungle Cruise. My new favorite ride is called Soarin' Over California. It is so cool! It's a ride that synchronizes a flight over the most beautiful landscapes of California. It's done in front of an Imax Screen. It was seriously cool to feel like I was soaring over the Golden Gate Bridge.

*The Spooky Kooky Castle, incidentally, is a now defunct show performed by two otters at Sea World. I knew was wasn't making it up!)

Here are some fun pics of the day:

Me and my friend, K.

Arrgh, matey! eSuitor...my very own Jack Sparrow!

In front of a Hollywood fake backdrop at California Adventure.

Feelin' the love at Tarzan's Treehouse.

Operation: Wonder Whoa-Man!

At the beginning of the month, my roommate and I set a goal for ourselves to lose "x" number of pounds by the end of the month. We would do this by making healthy eating choices and going walking together. Week one was going swimmingly. I lost three or four pounds because I stuck to my plan. (Amazing how that works!). Then, I thought it wouldn't hurt to eat an entire pack of slice and bake chocolate chip cookie dough over the course of four days.

Hey, look! There's the wagon. Wait a minute...I'm not on it!

*drumroll, please...cymbal crash!* I'm back on the wagon, people! And this time, I have a serious incentive to stay on. You see, my office is having a dress-up day for Halloween with a Superhero theme, and I will be going as my favorite superheroine. (I already bought my Wonder Woman costume, and it's cute! Finally, after all these years, I'll get to dress as WW! My little sister (pictured at left) got to have WW underoos when we were little. Somehow, I ended up with Scoobee-Doo. I SOOOOOOOO got the short end of the stick on that deal! I love this photo of my sister. The belly and the knees are too cute! And notice that the "cape" is actually a nightgown tied around her neck--what a resourceful kid!)

So last night, I had to kick it into Cuervo and start what will heretofore be referred to as "Operation: Wonder Whoa-Man!". That means that I need to drop some poundage quick to look like the hot crime fighter that I will be, come Oct. 31st. I don't think cellulite is tolerated in the Justice League. Then again, maybe Wonder Woman wore control top panty hose. I'm pretty sure she did.

No Fair! I Want One Too!!!

Autumn's Mom got one.

Ally Bean did, too.

So I had to jump on the band wagon and create an avatar of my own. It's mini me! Ain't she precious?!!!

What could be better...

than a Saturday evening spent with eSuitor and a cup of Mud Pie Mojo?

Thursday Thirteen: My First Thirteen Months in Los Angeles

September 2005: Cross-country Road Trip: Mom, Sis and I drove half way across the US of A from Texas to California in my little Japanese commuter car. On that trip:

-we stopped along the way and had lunch with my Dad. It was the first time we had all been together (just the 4 of us) since I was 18. It was truly a powerful and awesome experience. There is nothing like family. Mom, Dad and Jilly: I love you all!

-Friends from Texas were calling us saying that Hurricane Rita was on its way and that lots of people were evacuating.

-A few days after arriving in LA, I had a fender-bender.

October 2005: My grandmother passed away. She lived to be 95 years old. In her own words, she was "a tough old bird".

November 2005: I had my first two acting gigs in LA!

December 2005: From almost day one in LA, I knew that I had the worst roommate situation since my freshman year in college. The clincher came in December when my roommate, who offered to drive me to the airport to fly home for Christmas pulled a no-show, and left me frantically scrambling to find a ride. Thank the Lord for taxi-cabs!

January 2006: I decided to do the online dating thing through eHarmony.

February 2006: Tensions with my roommate got so bad that I decided to move out. I found a new place, and coordinated the move all by myself. I really felt like a grown-up! (I now have a fabulous roommate, and we get along great!) I also started my blog in February, which has brought my a lot of joy!

March 2006: I met a fabulous guy--eSuitor!

April 2006: I felt like a I really lived in LA when my church held their Easter Sunday service at the Hollywood Bowl. First kiss with eSuitor was the day before Easter. I got to celebrate my first kiss with eSuitor and the resurrection of our Lord all in the same weekend! ;)

May 2006: My Dad found out that he had a very serious cancer--metastatic melanoma. My sister and I spent time with him as he was receiving his treatments. I had never seen my Dad suffer so much. He is such a strong fighter! He really is one of my heroes. I love you, Dad! (Follow-up note: Please keep praying for my Dad's healing and strength. He will begin an alternative treatment next week, and I know he would appreciate your prayers.)

June 2006: Falling in love!

July 2006: July 4th was an awesome day that began at the beach, continued at Dodger stadium for a game and fireworks, and ended with words that I won't forget!

August 2006: One of my goals when I moved to Los Angeles was to spend more time with my relatives in San Francisco. eSuitor and I had an awesome roadtrip and a fun weekend with family.

September 2006: September was a month full of familiar feelings--the sense that I had come full circle. Senses tend to bring me back in time. The smells of the season, the coolness in the air, music in my car all brought me back to this time a year ago. When everything was new. When I was teetering on the edge of a new adventure. When I felt scared of this new life and hopeful at the same time. Looking back one year later gives me a feeling of accomplishment. A feeling of "Phew! I made it!". A feeling of gratitude for all that God has done.

"But be sure to fear the LORD and serve him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you." 1 Samuel 12:23

The Last Two Weekends in Pictures

Boy, I've gotten behind on posting some fun pics!

A couple weekends ago, I made a quick trip home for my friend's wedding in Tejas. It was lots of fun and a great excuse to see my family! Plus, Monicunchita (nickname), the exchange student who lived with us in high school was in town, so I got to see her too! Here's a pic of my sis, Monicunchita, me and mom.

This past weekend, eSuitor and I drove into the mountains and spent the day in Lake Arrowhead and Big Bear. It was cool and lovely. Beautiful scenery and fall color. We even happened upon an Octoberfest! Check it out!

Driving up to Lake Arrowhead, this view took my breath away.

Lake Arrowhead has the cutest little shopping center that looks like Germany...

...the perfect setting for lederhosen and an Octoberfest!

Fall color!!!!!

When I look into his eyes, I see myself...okay at least I can see my reflection in his sunglasses. eSuitor is totally working his mountain man look in the plaid flannel. Yummy!

Ray of Hope

Last night, my agent called and is sending me out on an audition today in the late morning. It's for an Office Max ad. I'm auditioning for the part of "businesswoman", so I wore my suit to work today.

Thank you so much for your encouraging words yesterday. They really meant a lot, and each comment was like a gust of wind propelling me through the day.

God is faithful and good, and I'm thankful for the gift of today's audition. :)

Follow-up note: Now it's 3pm. My audition went well! I'll let you know if there is any good news. Thanks again for your encouragement!

Remembering to Breathe

For the last couple of months, I have had a sort of on-going anxiety. Sometimes it is simmering just beneath the surface and other times it is a raging boil. Sometimes I forget about it altogether, but not for very long. I think it has to do with several different factors in life right now, but the one that is currently causing the anxiety to bubble up is my job.

There is nothing wrong with my job. The people are friendly; the atmosphere is clean (if not a little bland); and the work, after all, is just work. The problem with my job is me. I’m just not made for this kind of work. When I drive to the office some days, I feel a tightening in my stomach, as I anticipate the next nine hours. Already this morning, when the big boss walked by my desk, I noticed myself breathing in this weird way—not fluid, natural breaths; but square, regimented breaths. I had to remind myself to breathe normally.

In a really bad moment a couple weeks ago, I wrote the below poem. It’s pretty angsty, but it was the best way I could come up with to describe how absolutely draining it is to press myself into a mold that doesn’t fit me.


On Being Something I’m Not

My soul is a creative pool of life.
My soul is a garden.
My soul has important things to say and sing.
My soul feels joy in expression.

My dear, creative soul is doing its best to be something that it isn’t.
The creative pool of life is becoming a miry dead sea.
Plenty of desert sun, but no water for the garden. No fruit or flowers.
Important things to say and sing are said and sung in sterile stalls and echoing stairwells.
My soul, that longs to express itself, feels sick and stifled and like it wants to vomit so it can breathe again.


I know that this won’t last forever. It’s just a means to an end. I’m grateful for it, but how long, God?

Otto Titzling Would Be So Proud

Yesterday evening, my roommate and I went to a park to take a walk. Here's a snippet of our conversation:

Me: Roomie, I'm so proud of us for getting out here and exercising.

Roomie: I know! Me too! I'm not at home sitting on the sofa being a couch potato. No, I'm out here with nature and getting a workout.

Me: Exactly! And me? I'm no slouch either. I put on my collar and I'm out here taking myself for a walk...and by collar I mean sports bra, of course.

Roomie: Of course.

Let's Talk "Shop", Shall We?

One of the most exciting phone conversations I've had in the last year was when my agent called me to offer me representation. One of the most discouraging things has been the lack of phone calls I've received from the agency ever since (to send me on auditions). I've been praying for auditions lately, and I love how God often answers prayer through a backdoor approach.

When I left Texas to move to LA, my agent there told me that they still wanted to represent me, and that they'd let me know if any auditions came up in LA that they could send me on. For the first time in a year, they called me on Tuesday to tell me about an audition that I had this morning. (Thank You, God!) The audition was for the part of an 1800s French nurse.

My first thought: what to wear? Audition protocol is to dress "close to" the character without actually costuming yourself. In other words, wear an outfit that suggests a nurse without dressing in an actual nurse's costume. Being a redhead, white isn't my best color, so I don't have much white in my closet. So my mission (and, yes, I chose to accept it) was to find the perfect white cotton blouse that said "1800s French nurse". Of course, my dear friend Ann Taylor invited me over to her Loft where I found this. What'd ya think?

Meet Lincee, "The Bachelor" Blogger!

Did anyone watch the season premier of The Bachelor last night? Whether you did or not, I have a new blog for you to check out, but first I must give you a little history.

Lincee is a friend of my sister and me. She has a great personality and a sassy Texan accent to go with it. A few years ago, Lincee started writing hilarious, satirical recaps of each episode of The Bachelor, which she sent out in e-mails to a few friends and family members. Her friends and family thought they were so funny, they forwarded them on to their friends who would ask Lincee to add them to her distribution list. At the end of last year, she had 1000 people on her e-mail distribution list. All those e-mail addresses were too much for dear Lincee to keep up with, so she decided to start recapping each episode on a blog.

She started her blog last season, and after putting up her first post, her blog got 20,000 hits in its first week. By the end of the season, she was getting upwards of 100,000 hits on her blog each week! One of her regular commentors was the show's host, who somehow tracked her down and invited her out to LA to sit in the studio audience of The Bachelor Tells All episode. Oh, and did I mention that Lincee is my friend??? I'm friends with a blog celebrity!!!

Here's a pic of Lincee when she came out to Hollywood at the end of last season's The Bachelor to see the taping of "The Bachelor Tells All".

So for a fun read and a good laugh, check out this season's first post at The Bachelor Recaps!

Pretty, Sweet, and Creative...

This is my fabulous sister. Isn't she beautiful?!! She has been taking a cake decorating class, and her designs are too cute!!! I just had to post them to my bloggy.












Here is a closeup on the flower cake.

















Birthday clowns:

















Yellow Rose of Texas: