Return: To Bliss

The day we got engaged!

One of my favorite engagement pictures taken at Laguna Beach!

Our Wedding Day!

Happy Honeymooners!

By the way, today is 9-10-11. Just thought that was fun!

Three Years Ago Today...

About this time three years ago today, my family and all of the bridesmaids had made their way into the church or to the lobby of the church to make their processions, and I was left alone in the bride's room. All fell quiet, and I looked in the mirror and realized, "Wow! I'm a bride!" The moment I'd been dreaming about for much of my life was here. And then just like that, someone came and told me it was time!

I walked down the aisle, and we made our vows to one another!

This morning when I entered my kitchen, my beloved had left me three beautiful bouquets of roses to symbolize our three years together.

Honey, the past three years with you have been a joy and delight! Thank you for being such a wonderful husband. Saying "yes" to your marriage proposal was one of the easiest questions I've ever had to answer! And I'm so thankful that with each passing year I continue to realize that it was also one of the wisest decisions I've ever made. I love you with all my heart!

Restraint is HOT!

Last weekend, some friends got together for a girls' night to watch the BBC/A&E five hour version of Pride and Prejudice.

Image found here.

What a great film! I'm amazed at how relevant some of the themes of this movie still are today, and how wonderfully rich the characters and story are.

My friend Catherine and I stared at the screen transfixed by Mr. Darcy's delicious gentlemanliness. Now that was a man of integrity! He was honest, a man of his word, one who could own his failures and apologize for them, and still be someone who stood strong for the things he believed were right.

Watching the movie was so different from watching the romantic comedies of today. We have grown so accustomed to seeing every other character fall into bed together that we've become desensitized to it. I was struck when watching Pride and Prejudice that the steamiest thing to happen between the protagonists was their first kiss after they were married!

As I pondered the thing that made Mr. Darcy so darn sexy, it was simply that he had stellar character.

When Brian and I were engaged, we were amused at how often people were taken completely by surprise when they would find out that we weren't living together. It was just assumed by so many people that we would be cohabiting. And really, why would people think differently? That has become the norm in our culture.

I'll never forget Brian telling me why "saving it" for marriage was so important to him (and yes, it was important to me, too): "This is my one opportunity to prove to you that I have self-control. You are the love of my life, and by abstaining now, you will know that after we are married, I have the self-control to save my love for only you."

I loved that logic. It wasn't self-righteous--it was totally selfless and affirming of me! My man was determined to love me with restraint in order to reveal his character, and to me that was HOT, HOT, HOT!

As Lizzie Bennett might say, "Indeed, I have married exceedingly well!"

Before I met you, my love life was...

a bit of a crap shoot. I honestly didn't really know for what or whom I was looking.

As much as I love my parents, I can't say that theirs was a marriage that I hoped my own would one day resemble. It was marked by disappointments, unfulfilled hopes and at the end...divorce. I love them both dearly, and I mean absolutely no disrespect. I'm only saying that when it came to knowing what a vibrant and healthy marriage looked like, I was at a bit of a loss in my dating life. I just did my best to figure it out as I went along--sort of a trial and error kind of thing. Breakups started to feel a little embarrassing. Sort of like, Am I missing something? Why do all of my relationships end in a breakup? Thankfully one of my friends reminded me that the only one that wouldn't end in a breakup would be the one I marry. That sounded sensible.

As I journeyed through my single/dating years, I learned some valuable things:

~There are some good men and not-so-good in this world, and at first glance, it can be hard to tell the difference.

~If someone cannot name their shortcomings specifically and they don't respect your "no", they are absolutely not worth a single second of your time.

~Falling in love is the most wonderful feeling, and the pain of a broken heart is the worst. But it is survivable and life goes on.

Eight years after my parents divorce, my mom met and married the single gentleman who lived right next door to her. Theirs was an amazing love story. It was so fun to see my mom having this wonderful romance and marriage during my adult years. It gave me an opportunity to see a thriving marriage up close and personal. It also (along with some of the life lessons I'd learned along the way) gave me a compass and a roadmap, if you will, for dating. Finally, I had a little clue of what I was looking for. I also wrote a list (at the behest of a good friend) of qualities I was looking for, so that I'd be able to recognize the man of my dreams when I met him!

Finally, I did meet you...and you are so much more than "the man of my dreams". You're my Brian, and my life with you is so rich, the "before I met you" part fades in comparison.

If this had not happened, we would have never met...

When you have met and married someone you love so deeply, it's hard to imagine that anything could have kept you apart. Yet so much happened to bring us together!

The internet was invented.

We both had personal computers.

Neil Clark Warren created eHarmony.

We both got on eHarmony when we did.

We matched on eHarmony and communicated with each other.

We talked on the phone and that went well.

Finally, a first date, and then a second and a third!

We marvel that we met through a matching program on the internet, and wonder if we would have ever found each other any other way. We did realize that in 1994, we were both at the same conference in Nashville, Tennessee, but never met each other. In fact, Brian was breaking up with a girl that weekend! What if we would have met those 12 years earlier? What if we had never met at all? Would we have ever met some other way? Only God knows.

The important thing, though, is that we did meet, and that we are together, at last.

Celebrating TWO!

Thanks to all of you who left such sweet comments for us on our anniversary. I had to put a couple photos of the lovely roses I was greeted with when I walked into our kitchen on Tuesday morning!

We are planning to spend the weekend up in my hometown where we got married.  Of course, I love an excuse to "drag out" celebrating anything (birthdays, anniversaries etc.)!  We're going to stay at the hotel where we had our wedding reception, and we're also going to take a cooking class.  The class is called "Date Night in Rio de Janeiro", and all the recipes we'll be making are Brazilian!  Then we get to sit down and eat the delicious meal we cook!

Happy 4th of July weekend to all!

Two Years Ago Today...

I married the man of my dreams.

Marrying Brian was the easiest and best decision!

Our wedding day was full of joy and celebration--a moment in time I'll never forget!

Our marriage has been a blessing--a journey through time together with my soul mate.

Love * Loyalty * Lifetime

I love you, Brian! Happy Anniversary!

An Open Letter to my Knight

Dear Brian,

You are a true rock star.

On Thursday night when I started feeling like I was getting sick, you already knew that the weekend ahead we had planned was quite possibly about to go up in flames. You didn't even flinch. You just tucked me in to bed and told me we'd reevaluate in the morning.

Thirty minutes later, when the chills started in mixed with a cocktail of achy muscles and a fever, you calmly told me to hydrate myself and you hunkered down for next 24 hours, which I can only call The Day I Felt Like Doo Doo with an Extra Helping of Dukey on the Side.

You held my hand, you went to the pharmacy to buy my Tylenol, a thermometer, and Gatorade three separate times. Like I said? ROCK STAR!

You called your sister with whom you were really looking forward to spending the weekend (Mom, aren't you proud of how that preposition was handled?), and broke the news and you didn't even complain about my silly flu once.

That's right, I have the flu. When I got a little nervous on Friday afternoon about the possibility of it being the swine flu, you did internet research and then drove me to the local urgent care clinic, just so we could both rest easy.  

And then you tucked me back in bed and drove to my new favorite Mexican restaurant and bought me chicken tortilla soup because I was havin' a hankering.

You have been the sweetest, most loving caretaker, and I don't really know how to thank you sufficiently.

It was one of those weekends when I so appreciated having a husband who loves me so well. Life with you is exponentially better than life without you. Your love for me is sacrificial, and I love you so much.

This Starshine-in-distress knew she had married an awesome man the day she said "I do", but this weekend she realized that he is a Rock Star-in-shining-armor.

When he said "in sickness and in health", he really meant it, and that makes him more noble than any knight in the land.

Normal is a Relative Term

I got an e-mail from my mom last night in which she said she was marveling at how Hubs and I are living life as usual even though there is really nothing normal about our lives right now.

Isn't that the truth!

We are in serious transition right now. Half of our belongings are already packed in boxes. Our bedroom furniture sold yesterday, so our bed and box springs are just sitting on the floor and we're using TV trays for night stands!

I'm rehearsing a show right now and Hubs has finished his previous job and hasn't yet started his new one, so we are keeping crazy hours.  Late nights and lots of sleeping in...yea, me!

Meanwhile, we're living life as usual--spending time with friends, oil changes, meals, etc.

Life is good, and there are definitely no complaints here.  We found renters for our condo here in CA after we move, so that is a huge answer to prayer, and the major furniture items we hoped to sell have sold.  So like I said, no complaints.  

But as far as life as usual goes?  Well, normal is a relative term, right?

Gold Mountain Manor

In the final chapter of our ongoing quest to experience the best of California before we move to Texas, we spent a couple days in Big Bear Lake, a mountain town in Southern California. 

We stayed at a charming bed and breakfast called Gold Mountain Manor, and we just LOVED staying there!  It's like a log cabin mansion with cozy decor...just beautiful!

This was the rustic four poster bed in our room...

...and this was the cute little fire place next to the bed...

...I felt like I was on my second honeymoon!

As if I wasn't already charmed by the place, they sweetened the deal by informing us that they have a hot cocoa station, complete with mini marshmallows!

The breakfasts were gourmet, and they were happy to accommodate my vegetarian needs.

 

We loved Gold Mountain Manor, and would highly recommend it for anyone who wants to have a mountain getaway.

In fact, I'd give it five out of five pine cones!  

The Greatest of These

Well, we are buying a house in Texas!  Yikes, this is very exciting! As part of the incentive to entice us to buy, the sellers said that they would install granite countertops in the kitchen. So my mom and sister went to the house today while it was undergoing inspection to look at granite samples in the kitchen. They were taking photos and texting them to my e-mail, as Hubs and I were sizing up the choices.  It was all very much a group effort, and I'm so thankful to have a mom and sis who were willing to drive 45 minutes to be there for us in our absence, now that we're back in California.

A couple of hours later, Hubs and I were eating lunch together, and somehow we began reminiscing about our engagement, and the day we went to look at engagement rings. I was telling him how wonderful it was for me, as a woman, to have my beloved want to buy such a beautiful gift for me, simply because he wanted to give me a beautiful gift. It made me feel lovely and treasured.

Then suddenly, I began to cry, big sobbing tears. Something about our conversation tapped into a well of emotion that was lying just beneath the surface, and scratching the surface released a geyser of feeling. It is one thing to be loved by someone when you are feeling lovely, and it is quite another to be so loved during your most unlovely moments. Sitting across the table from me was my husband, a man who has now known me in my loveliest and most unlovely of moments, and his love for me has been steadfast.

In the midst of reflecting on my engagement ring and making "first world" decisions about granite countertops, I was reminded that none of that really matters, and it certainly pales in comparison to one of my life's biggest and most enduring treasures: the unconditional love of Hubs.

Transition

You may or may not know that over the past ten months, Hubs has been looking for a new job. He has worked for the past 19 years for a wonderful college ministry, and about a year and a half ago, he graduated with a masters degree from seminary. His desire has been to find a new job in a church in some kind of a pastoral role.

Our preference has been to find something in the Los Angeles area because we both love it here, and for me, it is the professional market that I moved here to work in.  From the beginning of Hubs' search, we have prayed that God would direct us to the right job for him by opening and closing doors. Boy did He ever answer--He closed 16 doors here in the Southern California area!  :)  We knew that if God was faithful to close that many doors that He must have had something pretty special in mind for the door that He would eventually open for us. We decided to expand our search criteria to include New York and Houston, since those are good markets for acting, and my family is in Houston.

In early October, Hubs submitted his resume to a church in Houston that began to show serious interest in him. A month ago, they flew us both out to see the church, meet the people, and for Hubs to interview. To make a long (and very awesome) story short, we loved the church, and they offered Hubs the job! 

We are feeling a mixed bag of emotions here. While we are sad to leave LA, our friends and the life we have so enjoyed here; we are very excited about the future. Hubs is thrilled about his new job opportunity, and I can't wait to live close to my mom, sister & bro-in-law, and of course, little Sam! Hubs is starting his new job March 1.

Meanwhile, we still have some time to live it up here in So Cal, so I decided to really go for it, acting-wise and audition away until it's time to move. I wrote a post yesterday about a dream I had the night before. Many of you said you were bummed that it was just a dream. Well, I think the reason I had that dream is because I found out on Monday afternoon that I have been cast in a play at The Neighborhood Playhouse Palos Verdes!  It is called Our Leading Lady, and this will be the first major production of the show since it opened in New York. I will be playing the washed up ingenue, Clementine Smith, who never arrives places on time and enjoys her whisky a little too much.  Fun, huh? ;)

My play will run February 19 - March 8, so Hubs will move to Texas before me, and then I'll join him as soon as my play closes. As stressful as I'm sure that will be, I'm grateful for his supportiveness and I'm thrilled to be able to leave LA on such a splendid note!

I need to write another post about the amazing ways that God answered our prayers by opening this door for us in Texas, but for now, let me just say that we are so thankful for the opportunities He has opened up for us. To God be the glory!

Days 8 and 9 - San Sebastian: Crown Jewel of Spain

Four years ago, my best friend Anne and I celebrated our 30th birthdays by going to San Sebastian. It is an adorable city on the Bay of Biscay. 

The charm just doesn't stop in this sweet town. San Sebastian is a horseshoe bay with an island out in the middle of it. 

While I wouldn't trade my 30th birthday celebration with my bestie for anything, the thought did occur to me those four years ago that San Sebastian is a bit like Venice or Paris...awesome to be there with your friend, but the city is meant for lovers. So ever since my first visit, I have had a little dream to return to San Sebastian one day with my husband, should I ever marry.

How lovely to have a dream come true! 

Oct. 13-14:  San Sebastian is in the Basque Country region of Spain, just across the border from France. So while it is a distinctly Basque/Spanish city, there is a fair amount of French influence.

Hubs and I had a great time wandering around the city, sitting at this outdoor cafe,

and seeing another beautiful cathedral...

...with stunning stained glass windows...

We also enjoyed wandering around the "Barrio Viejo", the old town section of the city, where we enjoyed a delicious dinner one night.

What is a charming seaside town without a charming boardwalk? I couldn't get over these beautiful street lamps that created the perfect setting for an evening stroll with my sweetie.

This is the fashion portion of the post. One day, we found ourselves out and about and nowhere near our hotel, and it got chilly, so Hubs bought this sporty blue hoody...

...and I bought this groovy striped sweater at H&M, one of my fave European stores (which is now in the US!).

One of my favorite moments of our entire trip was this dreary, drizzly morning. We woke up and decided to take a stroll on the beach. The misting rain didn't even matter. It was just a perfect moment with my love.

Our First Anniversary

Today is Hubs' and my first wedding anniversary. I can't believe how quickly this year passed!

To celebrate, we decided to take a weekend getaway to Dana Point and Disneyland/California Adventure. 

It was fun and very relaxing. On Sunday morning, we had breakfast on the patio of our hotel that overlooked the ocean, and it made us reminiscent of our breakfasts at the Princeville Hotel in Kaua'i overlooking Hanalei Bay.  Not quite the same, but a very nice reminder, nonetheless.

As we sat, we reflected on our first year together. Our first year has been a mix of joy and sorrow. We have had a lot to celebrate and to grieve. While the joyful times are great, it is in trying times when you see what your marriage is really made of. I'm so thankful for my husband. My biggest hope in finding a husband was that he would be a man of character and integrity, and is Hubs ever made of sturdy stuff! He has been a rock of support for me, a compassionate ear to listen, and a safe place of refuge. 

I love you, sweetie! Happy Anniversary! 

This year has been quite a ride, but there's no one else with whom I'd rather journey through life.

"W" is for Weed Eater

Hubs and I live in a condo with a little postage stamp backyard. My Texas friends with lawns to mow will want to spit on me when I say this, but here I go: Because it only rains here during the wintertime and the grass only grows in the spring, we only have to cut our grass once a year. As in ONE TIME A YEAR. 

During our first spring together when we were dating, Hubs let the grass get really long. (I like to think he was distracted by me!) Finally seeing that he had a weed eater in his garage, I offered to cut the grass for him. His response: Never come between a man and his power tools. 

I guess marriage changes things...well, some things. Now that we are married, he still lets the grass get really long.* (I still like to think he's distracted by me!) But this year when I offered to cut it, he was all "Sure!". 

Maybe he realized that he should never let a power tool come between his woman and him! ;)

*In Hubs' defense, he's no slacker! He's our family accountant, our family chef, and he even cleans the bathrooms!  Yea, Hubs! I LOVE YOU! (I miss you, too, but cuddles with this one help a lot...)

"O" is for Obesession

I think Hubs and I officially achieved "old married couple" status over the Christmas holidays when we realized our mutual love for Scrabble. We haven't stopped playing since--at least once a week, but often more than that!

Scrabble trivia: Did you know that 1 in 3 American families owns a Scrabble game?

Things I Learned on my Camping Trip

1. We have found friends to travel with!

Meet our friends Jenn and Dave:

They are a really wonderful couple who we have enjoyed getting to know. Hubs and Dave became friends in seminary.  Big bonus that Jenn and I have hit it off, too, so the four of us have been hanging out more and more, and we always have a good time.  The other night at dinner, we were talking about how fun it would be for the four of us to vacation together, so we thought a weekend camping trip would be a fun and easy way to test the sometimes tumultuous waters of traveling companions.  Our weekend was a hit, and we all agreed that future trips are in order!  Yea!

2.  Camping in the "wilderness" of Orange County is my kind of camping!  Our campgrounds were fairly rustic, and it felt like we were in the middle of nowhere.  We cooked at our campsite and ate our meals at this table.  It was great to be "unplugged" and away from the noise of our electronic lives.  Still, it was nice to have 4 bars on my cell phone if I needed it, and it was very comforting to know that Starbucks was only 5 minutes away.  On Saturday night, the wind picked up and it was so cold, so we decided to thaw in Starby's for an hour before we hunkered down in our mummy bags for a cold night of camping.  :)

3.  I want to like wine, but I just don't. Dave did a little research before our weekend and discovered that there was a vineyard/winery not far from the campgrounds.  I've always wanted to go to a wine tasting, and that little dream came true!  As my hubby and two friends were oo-ing and ahh-ing over the different wines, I (much to my chagrin) didn't really like a single one I tried.  I wish I could blame it on my oh-so discerning palate, but at the end of the day, I'm just not a wine person.  It was cool to taste the differences between the varieties we tried, and to recognize that "indeed this glass does have notes of grapefruit and citrus!"  It's just that I'd rather be drinking grapefruit juice.  Still, I'm glad I had the experience of a wine tasting!

4.  The view from the campground was gorgeous:

5. There's no one I'd rather share an air mattress with than my Hubs.  See his post on the camping trip here.

Zebras, Be Gone!

Before Hubs and I got married, he was living in the condo that we now share. While it was definitely a bachelor pad, he has good taste and picked a masculine theme and scheme for his place. For example, the artwork in the master bedroom was a grouping of black and white framed and matted zebra prints from IKEA.

Enter moi and a joyous exchange of vows, and ta-daa! It's a new look that's fun for a girl and a boy! Shortly after we married, we repainted the walls and got a new bedspread. And over the past couple weeks, we decided to 86 the zebras from their frames (though they had been taken down long ago), repaint the frames an "Espresso" color, and replace the prints with enlarged sepia-toned pictures of our wedding!

We both really love the way they look!

For those of you worried about them falling on our heads in the case of an earthquake, we hung them with these little tremor-proof cuties and then secured them with museum putty.

Bookends for 2007

Happy New Year, Everybody!



Hubs and I had a great time in Texas. We got to celebrate Christmas with family and good friends. The day after Christmas, we flew back to California and went to a conference in San Diego where Hubs worked for a few days. On New Year's Eve day, we drove back to LA, and on the way back we made one important stop in La Jolla. We had a lot of fun revisiting the place where we got engaged on New Year's Day of 2007! It seemed fitting to end the year right where it began.

2007 has been a great year for us--one full of so many blessings!

I hope you all have a wonderful 2008! God bless you!

Just engaged on January 1, 2007:

Now happily married! Revisiting the place of our engagement on December 31, 2007:

Happy New Year from us to you!

xo,

Starshine and Hubs