It's a Small World, After All!

This was a fun weekend! My good friend K and her hubby J (from Texas) were in town, so eSuitor and I joined them on Saturday for a day at Disneyland! Immediately, my kid-at-heartness bubbled right up to the surface. It's not everyday that you see Mary Poppins and Bert strolling arm-in-arm down Main Street, ya know?

We went on Space Mountain, took a "doom buggy" ride through the Haunted Mansion (which I kept wanting to call the Spooky Kooky Castle*), and we toured the Amazon on the Jungle Cruise. My new favorite ride is called Soarin' Over California. It is so cool! It's a ride that synchronizes a flight over the most beautiful landscapes of California. It's done in front of an Imax Screen. It was seriously cool to feel like I was soaring over the Golden Gate Bridge.

*The Spooky Kooky Castle, incidentally, is a now defunct show performed by two otters at Sea World. I knew was wasn't making it up!)

Here are some fun pics of the day:

Me and my friend, K.

Arrgh, matey! eSuitor...my very own Jack Sparrow!

In front of a Hollywood fake backdrop at California Adventure.

Feelin' the love at Tarzan's Treehouse.

Operation: Wonder Whoa-Man!

At the beginning of the month, my roommate and I set a goal for ourselves to lose "x" number of pounds by the end of the month. We would do this by making healthy eating choices and going walking together. Week one was going swimmingly. I lost three or four pounds because I stuck to my plan. (Amazing how that works!). Then, I thought it wouldn't hurt to eat an entire pack of slice and bake chocolate chip cookie dough over the course of four days.

Hey, look! There's the wagon. Wait a minute...I'm not on it!

*drumroll, please...cymbal crash!* I'm back on the wagon, people! And this time, I have a serious incentive to stay on. You see, my office is having a dress-up day for Halloween with a Superhero theme, and I will be going as my favorite superheroine. (I already bought my Wonder Woman costume, and it's cute! Finally, after all these years, I'll get to dress as WW! My little sister (pictured at left) got to have WW underoos when we were little. Somehow, I ended up with Scoobee-Doo. I SOOOOOOOO got the short end of the stick on that deal! I love this photo of my sister. The belly and the knees are too cute! And notice that the "cape" is actually a nightgown tied around her neck--what a resourceful kid!)

So last night, I had to kick it into Cuervo and start what will heretofore be referred to as "Operation: Wonder Whoa-Man!". That means that I need to drop some poundage quick to look like the hot crime fighter that I will be, come Oct. 31st. I don't think cellulite is tolerated in the Justice League. Then again, maybe Wonder Woman wore control top panty hose. I'm pretty sure she did.

No Fair! I Want One Too!!!

Autumn's Mom got one.

Ally Bean did, too.

So I had to jump on the band wagon and create an avatar of my own. It's mini me! Ain't she precious?!!!

What could be better...

than a Saturday evening spent with eSuitor and a cup of Mud Pie Mojo?

Thursday Thirteen: My First Thirteen Months in Los Angeles

September 2005: Cross-country Road Trip: Mom, Sis and I drove half way across the US of A from Texas to California in my little Japanese commuter car. On that trip:

-we stopped along the way and had lunch with my Dad. It was the first time we had all been together (just the 4 of us) since I was 18. It was truly a powerful and awesome experience. There is nothing like family. Mom, Dad and Jilly: I love you all!

-Friends from Texas were calling us saying that Hurricane Rita was on its way and that lots of people were evacuating.

-A few days after arriving in LA, I had a fender-bender.

October 2005: My grandmother passed away. She lived to be 95 years old. In her own words, she was "a tough old bird".

November 2005: I had my first two acting gigs in LA!

December 2005: From almost day one in LA, I knew that I had the worst roommate situation since my freshman year in college. The clincher came in December when my roommate, who offered to drive me to the airport to fly home for Christmas pulled a no-show, and left me frantically scrambling to find a ride. Thank the Lord for taxi-cabs!

January 2006: I decided to do the online dating thing through eHarmony.

February 2006: Tensions with my roommate got so bad that I decided to move out. I found a new place, and coordinated the move all by myself. I really felt like a grown-up! (I now have a fabulous roommate, and we get along great!) I also started my blog in February, which has brought my a lot of joy!

March 2006: I met a fabulous guy--eSuitor!

April 2006: I felt like a I really lived in LA when my church held their Easter Sunday service at the Hollywood Bowl. First kiss with eSuitor was the day before Easter. I got to celebrate my first kiss with eSuitor and the resurrection of our Lord all in the same weekend! ;)

May 2006: My Dad found out that he had a very serious cancer--metastatic melanoma. My sister and I spent time with him as he was receiving his treatments. I had never seen my Dad suffer so much. He is such a strong fighter! He really is one of my heroes. I love you, Dad! (Follow-up note: Please keep praying for my Dad's healing and strength. He will begin an alternative treatment next week, and I know he would appreciate your prayers.)

June 2006: Falling in love!

July 2006: July 4th was an awesome day that began at the beach, continued at Dodger stadium for a game and fireworks, and ended with words that I won't forget!

August 2006: One of my goals when I moved to Los Angeles was to spend more time with my relatives in San Francisco. eSuitor and I had an awesome roadtrip and a fun weekend with family.

September 2006: September was a month full of familiar feelings--the sense that I had come full circle. Senses tend to bring me back in time. The smells of the season, the coolness in the air, music in my car all brought me back to this time a year ago. When everything was new. When I was teetering on the edge of a new adventure. When I felt scared of this new life and hopeful at the same time. Looking back one year later gives me a feeling of accomplishment. A feeling of "Phew! I made it!". A feeling of gratitude for all that God has done.

"But be sure to fear the LORD and serve him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you." 1 Samuel 12:23

The Last Two Weekends in Pictures

Boy, I've gotten behind on posting some fun pics!

A couple weekends ago, I made a quick trip home for my friend's wedding in Tejas. It was lots of fun and a great excuse to see my family! Plus, Monicunchita (nickname), the exchange student who lived with us in high school was in town, so I got to see her too! Here's a pic of my sis, Monicunchita, me and mom.

This past weekend, eSuitor and I drove into the mountains and spent the day in Lake Arrowhead and Big Bear. It was cool and lovely. Beautiful scenery and fall color. We even happened upon an Octoberfest! Check it out!

Driving up to Lake Arrowhead, this view took my breath away.

Lake Arrowhead has the cutest little shopping center that looks like Germany...

...the perfect setting for lederhosen and an Octoberfest!

Fall color!!!!!

When I look into his eyes, I see myself...okay at least I can see my reflection in his sunglasses. eSuitor is totally working his mountain man look in the plaid flannel. Yummy!

Ray of Hope

Last night, my agent called and is sending me out on an audition today in the late morning. It's for an Office Max ad. I'm auditioning for the part of "businesswoman", so I wore my suit to work today.

Thank you so much for your encouraging words yesterday. They really meant a lot, and each comment was like a gust of wind propelling me through the day.

God is faithful and good, and I'm thankful for the gift of today's audition. :)

Follow-up note: Now it's 3pm. My audition went well! I'll let you know if there is any good news. Thanks again for your encouragement!

Remembering to Breathe

For the last couple of months, I have had a sort of on-going anxiety. Sometimes it is simmering just beneath the surface and other times it is a raging boil. Sometimes I forget about it altogether, but not for very long. I think it has to do with several different factors in life right now, but the one that is currently causing the anxiety to bubble up is my job.

There is nothing wrong with my job. The people are friendly; the atmosphere is clean (if not a little bland); and the work, after all, is just work. The problem with my job is me. I’m just not made for this kind of work. When I drive to the office some days, I feel a tightening in my stomach, as I anticipate the next nine hours. Already this morning, when the big boss walked by my desk, I noticed myself breathing in this weird way—not fluid, natural breaths; but square, regimented breaths. I had to remind myself to breathe normally.

In a really bad moment a couple weeks ago, I wrote the below poem. It’s pretty angsty, but it was the best way I could come up with to describe how absolutely draining it is to press myself into a mold that doesn’t fit me.


On Being Something I’m Not

My soul is a creative pool of life.
My soul is a garden.
My soul has important things to say and sing.
My soul feels joy in expression.

My dear, creative soul is doing its best to be something that it isn’t.
The creative pool of life is becoming a miry dead sea.
Plenty of desert sun, but no water for the garden. No fruit or flowers.
Important things to say and sing are said and sung in sterile stalls and echoing stairwells.
My soul, that longs to express itself, feels sick and stifled and like it wants to vomit so it can breathe again.


I know that this won’t last forever. It’s just a means to an end. I’m grateful for it, but how long, God?

Otto Titzling Would Be So Proud

Yesterday evening, my roommate and I went to a park to take a walk. Here's a snippet of our conversation:

Me: Roomie, I'm so proud of us for getting out here and exercising.

Roomie: I know! Me too! I'm not at home sitting on the sofa being a couch potato. No, I'm out here with nature and getting a workout.

Me: Exactly! And me? I'm no slouch either. I put on my collar and I'm out here taking myself for a walk...and by collar I mean sports bra, of course.

Roomie: Of course.

Let's Talk "Shop", Shall We?

One of the most exciting phone conversations I've had in the last year was when my agent called me to offer me representation. One of the most discouraging things has been the lack of phone calls I've received from the agency ever since (to send me on auditions). I've been praying for auditions lately, and I love how God often answers prayer through a backdoor approach.

When I left Texas to move to LA, my agent there told me that they still wanted to represent me, and that they'd let me know if any auditions came up in LA that they could send me on. For the first time in a year, they called me on Tuesday to tell me about an audition that I had this morning. (Thank You, God!) The audition was for the part of an 1800s French nurse.

My first thought: what to wear? Audition protocol is to dress "close to" the character without actually costuming yourself. In other words, wear an outfit that suggests a nurse without dressing in an actual nurse's costume. Being a redhead, white isn't my best color, so I don't have much white in my closet. So my mission (and, yes, I chose to accept it) was to find the perfect white cotton blouse that said "1800s French nurse". Of course, my dear friend Ann Taylor invited me over to her Loft where I found this. What'd ya think?

Meet Lincee, "The Bachelor" Blogger!

Did anyone watch the season premier of The Bachelor last night? Whether you did or not, I have a new blog for you to check out, but first I must give you a little history.

Lincee is a friend of my sister and me. She has a great personality and a sassy Texan accent to go with it. A few years ago, Lincee started writing hilarious, satirical recaps of each episode of The Bachelor, which she sent out in e-mails to a few friends and family members. Her friends and family thought they were so funny, they forwarded them on to their friends who would ask Lincee to add them to her distribution list. At the end of last year, she had 1000 people on her e-mail distribution list. All those e-mail addresses were too much for dear Lincee to keep up with, so she decided to start recapping each episode on a blog.

She started her blog last season, and after putting up her first post, her blog got 20,000 hits in its first week. By the end of the season, she was getting upwards of 100,000 hits on her blog each week! One of her regular commentors was the show's host, who somehow tracked her down and invited her out to LA to sit in the studio audience of The Bachelor Tells All episode. Oh, and did I mention that Lincee is my friend??? I'm friends with a blog celebrity!!!

Here's a pic of Lincee when she came out to Hollywood at the end of last season's The Bachelor to see the taping of "The Bachelor Tells All".

So for a fun read and a good laugh, check out this season's first post at The Bachelor Recaps!

Pretty, Sweet, and Creative...

This is my fabulous sister. Isn't she beautiful?!! She has been taking a cake decorating class, and her designs are too cute!!! I just had to post them to my bloggy.












Here is a closeup on the flower cake.

















Birthday clowns:

















Yellow Rose of Texas:

Saving an Incredibly Important Tradition

One of the coolest things that my company has been doing to boost morale and to thank its employees for their good work has been to provide Krispy Kreme doughnuts on the last workday of the month. I loved it so much that I even wrote about it once here. I work in the mortgage industry for my day job, and as the housing market is s-l-o-w these days, the company has taken a hit. You can imagine my horror when an e-mail came across my computer last month bearing the following grievous news:

One of our best traditions at _________ is promoting healthy living for our employees. We were at the forefront of this trend in the early 1980s, when we opened our first on-site fitness center, and we continued the tradition in the 1990s, when we began to offer healthy alternatives to the standard fast food fare in our own cafeterias. However, another _________ tradition has been to offer free doughnuts at month-end to thank employees for their hard work.

You can see that this tradition is an extremely unhealthy temptation and doesn't contribute to a healthy lifestyle. The typical small glazed doughnut contains 200 calories, half of which are from fat. Doughnuts are high in sugar and carbohydrates. They are considered "empty calories" that don't make you feel full for very long. We're not alone in our concern about unhealthy foods - other companies, and especially schools, are taking similar steps to reduce or eliminate high-fat or unhealthy food alternatives.

While we believe in personal choice, we also feel we need to take responsibility for helping our employees lead healthy lifestyles....

Um, okay, whatever. Really, I understand that the mortgage industry is taking a hit, but please don't lie to me. Don't condescend. Just tell me you can't afford to buy us our beloved Krispy Kremes anymore. (Thanks for letting me get that out!)

Today, in honor of it being the last day of the month, my group is having a breakfast potluck. There is a veritable smorgasbord of food being laid out as I write this post. Can you guess what I brought?

Doughnuts!

Thirteen What Ifs

What if...

-ice cream were good for you?
-money really did grow on trees?
-we didn't live in a fallen world?
-a kiss could make it all better?
-your wildest dream came true?
-your deep, dark secret were out in the open and it no longer held you by its chains?
-you said what is really on your mind?
-guilt went away?
-love was always there all along?
-you took a big risk?
-you said, "I love you"?
-fear weren't a factor?
-you were overflowing with hope?

Finding my Political Voice

Disclaimer: I'm not entirely comfortable posting this to my blog, but I've decided to put it up anyway--maybe just for a while. This is the post I wrote about here, when I was trying to decide if it would be wise to discuss my (admittedly only partially informed) political opinions on my blog for all to read. I tend to process my thoughts as I write, so please read this more as my political musings than my definitive opinion on George W. Bush and our government.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I just don't quite know what to make of our nation's current President. I voted for George Bush twice. (I know, many of you are probably going into cardiac arrest right now.) I don't hate him. I feel grateful to have a President that has strong convictions and isn't wishy-washy. The other side of that coin is that I find that I can't watch his addresses. I have to change the channel when he comes on - partly because I can't bear to watch or listen to his apparent lack of charisma, and partly because I sense an underlying defensiveness in his tone, and that disturbs me. People who are defensive on a regular basis make me uncomfortable.

As an American, I think I do feel safer now than I did five years ago because of all the homeland security measures that have been taken. On the other hand, I have never felt so hated by other nations. (I was living in Spain as the war on Iraq was starting, and the anti-American sentiment was impossible to miss.) I think America will always be hated in many parts of the world because we are a rich and powerful nation (never mind the fact that we are benevolent in terms of financially supporting many of them). We have power and resources, and we have the right to defend ourselves. However, I don't believe that our power and resources give us the right to do whatever we want in the world. I don't think we should act as a country in a way that seeks to gain the approval of other nations. Still, it would be nice to be looked upon as a hero nation (ie. post WW II) again, and not as a bully nation the way so much of the world views us now.

For me, this issue is really not a partisan thing. Some of my views are more conservative and some more liberal. I just would like to feel a greater sense of integrity at the heart of our government. The pessimist in me is sighing. The optimist believing that we will one day have that again. The realist in me honestly wondering what in the world we're coming to as a nation.

Underneath the Wrapping

I stumbled onto this very interesting blog post by Brant Hansen this morning, in which a father laments the fact that his young daughter is drop-dead gorgeous…and already knows it. He makes the point that outer-beauty can actually be a deterrent to developing inner-beauty. That is to say that because our culture is constantly awarding pretty people just for being pretty, the constant doting can act as a retardant to the growth of that person’s character.

It raises an interesting question for us Americans who seem to be rather obsessed with external beauty. The movies we produce are often cast with good-looking, but rather untalented people. Honestly, I think that’s why I find British films so refreshing. They are cast with people that look like…well…normal people! And the actors are really talented! Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that every gorgeous American actor doesn’t possess talent. I am saying, though, that one of the reasons I liked Little Miss Sunshine so much was because the emphasis was much more on telling a story about everyday people I can relate to, and not so much about eye candy.

Reading Brant’s article made me think back to my elementary school years. Cliques formed and there was definitely an "in" crowd that I was not a part of. I remember coming home from school and talking through tears to my mom about how it hurt my feelings not to be accepted by that group. She used to tell me over and over that God loves me just the way that I am. I remember thinking that I wasn’t quite sure that God’s love had much to do with it. But I can see now how very much it did. He loves and accepts me for the Tracy that I am on the inside. He’s much more concerned with what’s inside the package than how pretty the wrapping paper is. Looking back, I am actually thankful for the struggle of not being "popular" way back then, because I grew into the me that God wanted me to be. As I got older and started high school, I still wasn’t in the "in" crowd, but I was friends with people in different groups. I was marching to a different beat, for sure, but I started to like it! I don’t know that I would have ever discovered the beauty of being unique without the struggle of not fitting in.

Outer beauty is fine, but it doesn’t last. What lasts is a beautiful heart. I’m thankful for a mother who pointed me toward God’s love and acceptance when I didn’t feel loved and accepted by my peers. And I’m thankful to my loving God, Who is much more concerned with the strength of my character than the length of my lashes.

You know there needs to be a little more mystery in your relationship when...

...your boyfriend tells you that "maybe you should buy some Metamucil...ya know...just to help you stay regular."

Yep. It's true. Bless my colon's achy breaky heart.

Note to readers: Don't get me wrong. eSuitor was just trying to be helpful. I was the one giving him a little T.M.I.

Note to self: Take your Gas-Ex and shut up already!

Removing the Gigantic 2x4 From My Eye

"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?" -Matthew 7:3

This morning, I was on a conference call in our board room when I looked up and saw that my coworker had a huge booger dangling from her left nostril. I thought to myself, "Bless her heart. She has no idea." Then I looked down so as not to stare at the booger. And I was greeted by my open fly, who suddenly looked me square in the face and said, "Bless your heart. You really had no idea."

Talking Point

I'm thinking something over in my mind, chewing on it, wrestling with it, and still not sure what I think about it.

Blogging is an interesting form of self-expression because it's like a journal, but without the privacy. I love that it's a forum that is interactive and that allows people to respond. But I'm wondering: How do you other bloggers decide what is appropriate for you to post?

I recently wrote a post that I decided not to put on my blog called "Finding My Political Voice". So far, I haven't written anything about politics on this blog. Partly because I don't generally care for political debates. Partly because I tend to hold political views that don't typically sync with the circles I run in. Partly because I fear that by expressing my thoughts about politics, I might somehow offend my readers and lose any sphere of influence I might have otherwise had through this site.

I realize that it's a little paradoxical, considering that part of the reason I started this blog was to have a "place for me to openly express myself, free from the judgement of my inner critic." I still battle the critcal voice inside when I write, but what I'm thinking more about in this case is the judgement of my readers.

So I'm curious to know how you make such decisions on your blogs. Do you throw all caution to the wind and post whatever you want? Do you consider your readership? What factors do you take into consideration?

Butterfly in the Sky...

It's Friday, and I want to write about something fluffy and light. So I've decided to make this a Friday Five and write about...

Five Television Theme Songs that Make Me Want to Sing Along:

1.) Reading Rainbow - Did you guys ever watch this show? It is so cute. It has little kids giving reviews of their favorite books. And the theme song is well...a little inspiring. Check out these lyrics (slightly modified to not make it too long and repetitive):

Butterfly in the sky,
I can go twice as high!
Take a look,
It's in a book,
A Reading Rainbow!
I can go anywhere,
I can be anything,
Take a look,
It's in a book,
A Reading Rainbow!

2.) Friends - Who in my generation doesn't know the lyrics of this song by heart? They just make ya feel good!

3.) Silver Spoons - This song is really nothing special in itself, but I associate it with my sixth grade crush on Ricky Schroeder. 'Nuff said!

4.) Good Times - Ain't we lucky we got 'em?

5.) The Animaniacs - This was one of the most brilliant cartoons, and the opening theme song was nothing short of genius! My college roommate and I memorized it and would sing along every afternoon.

Ode to Pop Tarts

It’s hard to explain my craving for you.
You look quite like cardboard and taste like it, too.
You’ve lots of preservatives and not much nutrition.
But, still, I must nibble in sweet, sweet submission.
Your sprinkles are ugly, your icing is hard.
You'll turn my caboose to into jiggling lard.
I’ve had my granola, and orange juice, too.
But deep in my heart, I’m still longing for you.

Unconditional

Life is beautiful.
Life is a gift.
Life has its moments of genuine bliss.
Life’s full of love, of heartache and pain.
Sometimes it hurts and there’s no one to blame.
Sometimes I laugh and sometimes I cry.
Sometimes I’m blah and I’ve no idea why.
See, life isn’t perfect,
And neither are we.
The road isn’t free from its bumps and debris.
We all need His grace,
That’s why He died.
No need to cover and no need to hide.
No need to pretend there aren’t bruises and scars.
God loves and accepts us the way that we are.

September 11, 2001: A Reflection

The morning of September 11, 2001, I was up early getting ready to go to a funeral in San Antonio. One of my backyard neighbors who was sort of a surrogate grandparent during my growing up years had passed away. As my mom and I were getting ready, we had Good Morning America on, and breaking news informed us that one of the Twin Towers had been hit by an airplane. As we watched the first tower blazing with fire, we saw the second tower get hit by another airplane. A while later, we heard the news that yet another plane had hit the Pentagon and a fourth plane crashed in a field in Pennsylvania. I began to worry that we would spend the rest of the day hearing reports about major cities throughout our country being attacked. We went to the funeral that morning and spent the rest of the day with our eyes and ears glued to the television and radio, as did the majority of America.

I lived in New York City from 1996-1999. I have many wonderful memories of the World Trade Center. All of these memories involve dancing. The top floor of one of the towers had a bar and a dance floor where swing bands would play. The view of the Brooklyn Bridge was awesome. My friends and I went dancing there several times. Miriam and Marion, two German girls who became close friends of mine, had a farewell party there before they returned home--it was there that the three of us exchanged inexpensive, plastic bracelets and promised to wear them until we saw each other again (which we did four months later in Frankfurt).

I spent part of 9/11/01 going through a mental list of people I knew who worked at the WTC. I found out that my friend Linda, was working at her company's Jersey office that day. My college friend, Stephanie, had a doctor's appointment that morning, and didn't go in to work. I am so thankful that their lives were safe. I was resting easy. No one I knew was harmed. Then panic struck when I rememered my old boss, Joel. He had gone to work for a new company since I left New York, and his new office was in the World Financial Center, right across the street from the WTC. Was he okay? I called his office. No answer. I called his home and only got an answering machine. I called his cell, but there was no service. For days, I didn't hear any news from him. Finally, about five days later, he and his wife made their way from the city to their country home where I had left messages, and he called to tell me they were safe.

I was surprised in the days following 9/11 that part of me really wanted to be back in NYC. My beloved Manhattan had been injured, and I wanted to be part of the healing process, or at least to be there to grieve with New Yorkers. I didn't make it back to the city for two more years. I happened to be there on the two year anniversary of 9/11. I didn't know what to expect when I went to ground zero that day. it was just a big, leveled construction zone. Buildings around ground zero, proudly displayed American flags. A cross made of scrap metal left from one the buildings stood as a humble reminder of the lives lost that day. People were reading biographies of those who died to honor and remember them. At night, two tall spot lights shone high up into the dark sky in a somber recreation of the skyline I loved. I soberly took it all in. I walked to the nearest payphone to call my old boss and got his voicemail. I intended to leave a simple message saying that I was at ground zero and I was remembering how concerned I was for him two years before. I ended up bursting into uncontrollable sobs as I tried to leave a coherent message. I hung up, feeling embarrassed. Joel called me back a few weeks later and said that he saved my message because it meant so much to him. Suddenly, I didn't feel so embarrassed anymore. It was just delayed grief, and he understood. He recounted to me the horror of that day. How his building shook when the planes hit. How awful it was to see such terror. How he couldn't look at the burning buildings anymore. He just had to turn around and walk home.

I call Joel every year on 9/11 just to tell him that he is part of my memory of that day. And to tell him that he is my friend, and I'm glad he is alive.

It's in the Air!

Last night, as I was walking to my car after dinner, I noticed a chill in the air. Fog was rolling in, and I wished I had a jacket. My teeth started chattering as I said good-bye to my friend.

This morning, I drove to work with overcast skies, and there was still a chilly crispness to the air. Could it be that summer is over? I got on weather.com when I sat down to my desk, and it informed me that the high today is only going to be 75 degrees, and that for the next week, the temperature is not to rise over 80.

Autumn has long been my favorite season of the year. I love turtlenecks and blue jeans, colorful leaves, and taking long walks outside without breaking a sweat.

Part of the reason I wanted to move to southern California was for the temperate climate. As much as I love Texas, the 5-6 months of the year spent in 90+ degree weather just doesn't agree with me. So naturally, my first summer in LA has been one of the hottest summers LA has seen in over a decade.

But things are looking up today! Fall is in the air! I can feel it, and it makes my heart feel tranquilo.

Other notable people who love autumn:

My Dad - When I graduated from acting school, I got my first professional job doing a musical called How the West was Won at a gorgeous amphitheatre in Utah. Dad came out to see me perform. It meant so much that he made the trip out to see me. I remember taking a day trip to Zion National Park. It was a crisp autumn day and the leaves were turning. We both enjoyed taking in the beauty of nature. And I remember both of us remarking that autumn is our favorite season. Just a simple moment that is fond to me.

My blog buddy, Autumn's Mom...she loves autumn so much, she named her daughter after this fabulous season!

Labor Day Weekend In Pictures

eSuitor's mom came to visit this weekend. She is such a fun and kind woman. We all had so much fun being tourists in LA. We spent Saturday morning at the Huntington Gardens in Pasadena.

It was fun to go back to Huntington Gardens with eSuitor. He took me there in the spring on one of our first dates. :)

On Sunday morning, we went to Laguna Beach to have brunch and to walk along the boardwalk. It is such a pretty beach and town.

Crying in my Cheesecake

On Saturday, I went to see Little Miss Sunshine with eSuitor and his mom, who was in town for the weekend. SUCH a great movie! I haven't seen a movie that was so touching in quite a long time. We had just had lunch at The Cheesecake Factory and needed to sit somewhere for a couple hours to let our food digest. So we ordered a piece of banana cream cheesecake to go and split it between the three of us in the theater.

The movie (don't worry...I won't give anything away) is the story of a dysfunctional family's journey together in a VW Bus to take the youngest family member to California to compete in a children's beauty pageant. Along their journey, prepare yourself to become endeared to them and to laugh and cry...a lot.

I tend to be a very "involved" movie watcher. I'm a pretty empathetic person by nature, so I really feel for characters in movies. And it is not hard at all to feel for the characters in this particular movie because there is at least one person in the crazy cast of characters that you can relate to. They are all vulnerable in their own way, which makes them all the more endearing.

I'm thankful that the audience I was watching with on Saturday was a vocal one, so they could drown me out--I was pretty much a basket case. The movie would layer comic moments on top of heart-wrenching ones, so that I was blubbering like a baby and howling with laughter all at once. I did the "ugly cry" where tears were streaming down my face as I made indeciferable sounds. Is she laughing? Is she crying? Is she communicating with jungle creatures? Very hard to tell.

All three of us enjoyed the film. It is a wonderfully redemptive story of an imperfect yet lovable family. And who of us can't relate to that?

And the Daytime Emmy for Best Melodramatic Perfomance at Work Goes to...

I am typically a pretty relaxed, laid-back person. But when I feel a lot of stress mounting, I'm like a pressure cooker, and when that top pops, it ain't pretty.

I came back to work today after being home sick for the past couple days with the flu. Having the flu stunk, but it did provide a nice vacation from work. I knew today wasn't getting off to a good start when I cried before I'd even been there for two hours.

I was wading through two days of e-mails and had a slightly curt one from a woman informing me that she left me a voicemail yesterday and hadn't heard back from me yet. There is a problem with some data. Oh, even writing about data problems sounds so boring, I want to ggoooo tttooooooooooooooo *zzzzzz*.

Anywho, I explain the situation to my coworker, who patiently explains to me that I've been interpretting data the wrong way on a project that I've been working on for the past month. At that point, I politely told my coworker and my boss, "I need to excuse myself to go cry now." I briskly walked out to the hallway. (And kids, I was wearing high-heeled black boots today, so I'm sure my strides had attitude.) I got out to the hallway, and a lovely string of curse words flowed past my lips like rusty water from a country faucet. And then, with much dramatic flair, I kicked open the ladies room door, made my way to my favorite big stall, locked the door, and did that thing where you lean against the wall and slowly slide down it in melodramatic fashion as the waterworks began. Seriously, if this job isn't preparing me to win my first Daytime Emmy, I don't know what is! Thankfully, no one else was in the john (except for my imaginary, adoring fans who all threw roses at my feet as I drenched them with my tears). It was beautiful. Really.

After I gave my fans a memorable acceptance speech, I took my Emmy to the sink where I splashed cold water on my face and returned to my computer. The rest of the day at work was fairly uneventful.

I think that rewarding myself with a bowl of Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Icecream was the right thing to do. Don't you?

Weekend in San Francisco

This past weekend, eSuitor and I took a roadtrip up to San Francisco to visit my aunt and cousins. One of my goals since moving to California has been to spend more time with my extended family out here. So given that the family was celebrating my aunt's birthday, it was the perfect excuse for a quick visit.

Here are some photos of the party:

My aunt and cousin.

The cousins.

eSuitor and me! :)

A special note to my Bay Area blog buddies: This was a whirlwind weekend roadtrip, so I'm sorry I didn't get to see any of you. Next time I'm up there, I hope we can meet each other!

A Heartfelt Welcome to my Two Main Men

I'd like to take this opportunity to welcome the two men in my life to my blog: my Dad and eSuitor.

Hi Dad! I gave my Dad my blog address yesterday, and he sent me the sweetest e-mail telling me that he read the entire blog in one sitting. I felt so honored and touched. I love you, Dad! My Dad wants me to thank all of you who have been praying for him. And I quote from his e-mail, "Thank all your dear friends who have continually prayed for us, especially those who do not know me but love you." Please continue to pray for God to heal my Dad. Thank you, thank you!

And now a special welcome to eSuitor. So, how does it feel to have official access to my blog? Enjoy! I say lots of nice things about you. eSuitor has known about my blog for a long time and even known that I write about him. And he's been the MOST respectful of my wishes not to give him my blog address until I decided to. I guess it's a little bit like giving your boyfriend the key to your diary. :) Anyway, Baby, you got the key to my heart, and that's pretty much what I share in my blog anyway, so read on. (And please forgive me for what I wrote about in my last post! Tee-hee!)

Dad and eSuitor, welcome! You are both tremendous blessings in my life.

Join me in welcoming my two main men!

He Loves Me That Much

If it seems like I haven't written much about eSuitor lately, it's because he's been out of town...for three weeks...in solitude! Yes, you heard me correctly...in solitude. As part of his seminary program, one of the things he had to do to fulfill the requirements for his degree (an M.A. in Spiritual Formation and Soul Care) is to go on a three week Intensive Spiritual Journey. Three weeks alone with God. His experience was great, and it has been fun to hear about it since his return. I missed him so much while he was gone, but he finally came back on Friday.

We spent all day together on Saturday, and that evening, he took me out for a lovely dinner at a beautiful French restaurant, complete with live accordian music! As we sat down at the table, my tummy was feeling a little funny. By the time my meal came, I was having sharp pains in my side and my stomach was bloated like a balloon. I could only eat a few bites. We had our meals boxed up and drove straight to a drug store. I knew it was just a lot of gas. So eSuitor ran in the store and bought me some Gas-X. I popped two tablets, and within ten minutes, I was starting to feel better.

I warned eSuitor as we drove back to his house that he was possibly going to hear me fart for the first time. I certainly hoped not, and I told him that I hoped I wouldn't be the first to cross that line in our relationship. Especially not tonight--I was all dressed up and feelin' pretty! He pulled the car into his garage, and as we're getting out, I hear the sound of my galant knight breaking wind.

"I just didn't want you to have to break the fart barrier first, baby!", he said. "You now have farting freedom."

Yep...he loves me that much!

Five Songs for a Sleepy Monday to Help You Get Your Groove Back

Respect by Aretha Franklin
Son of a Preacher Man by Dusty Springfield
Ain’t No Mountain High Enough by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell
O, Happy Day from the Sister Act 2 Sound Track
Joyful, Joyful from the Sister Act 2 Sound Track

Embarassing Moment

Well, the audition went well. We should know something in the next few days. So I'll let you know if hear any good news.

For the audition, my friend L. and I were standing in front of a blue screen being interviewed together on camera. I think they were trying to get an idea of our personalities and how we interact as friends. They asked us several questions, and they asked me to tell about my most embarassing moment. So...I thought I'd share it with you, too!

In the summer of 1993, I spent half a summer in Eastern Europe. The other women I was traveling with noticed (as did I) that in broad daylight, various drunk men would simply walk up to us and grope us. Needless to say, it was very disconcerting. I decided that the next time it happened, I would do something strong like shove the guy away from me to let him know that his groping wasn't appreciated.

The morning after I made that decision, I was in a lovely bank with marble columns--the last place you'd expect any trouble--changing money. As I was signing on the transaction, I saw a stranger approaching out of the corner of my eye. I felt a tap, tap, tap on the side of my boob. Immediately, I went into denial. "Surely this isn't happening." But a few seconds later, I felt the tap, tap, tap again. So I turned to the strange man, shoved him away from me and like a polite Texan girl said, "Stop it, please!" In broken English, the man politely responded, "I am very sorry." I got a good look at him for the first time and noticed that he had a long silver cane in his hand. He was blind and just feeling his way along! My boob just got in the way! I then started apologizing and the poor man walked away.

I didn't know if I should laugh or cry. I think I did a little of both.

No Wammies!

Tomorrow after work, I'm going to meet a friend of mine at a production studio in Hollywood to audition for a gameshow. So, it's not actually acting, but you might be able to see my face on your tv screen one day soon. Of course, we haven't been chosen yet, but they liked our bios enough to call us in to interview us in person. I'll keep you posted!

Book Recommendation

I am in the middle of reading a fascinating book called Girl Meets God by Lauren Winner. It is a memoir about her spiritual journey that began as a child raised as a reform Jew, continues with her conversion in college to Orthodox Judaism, and culminates in her suprising decision to convert once and for all to Christianity.

Winner is an engaging and brilliant writer, and a bonafide historian. Intrigued by her academic accomplishments and impressed by her spiritual journey, I did a little searching to see if she has a website. I was delighted to discover that she also has a blog! If you decide to read the book, let me know what you think!

A Rich Family History

My mom recently returned from a trip to Connecticut and New York where she reconnected with several friends from her childhood and early adulthood. Many of the friends she saw knew her parents (my dear grandparents, who both passed on years ago).

Mom told me that it was so fun to talk to her friends and hear them recount stories of her dad. My Grampy was a COLORFUL man! He had a thick New York accent and had a tendency to swear like a sailor. One of the treasures we have of him is a video taken at a Shell station. In the 1960s, Shell was doing an ad campaign in which they had a hidden camera and they would have a "service station worker"/actor approach the car and ask the driver filling up why they chose Super Shell gasoline.

Grampy was one of the unsuspecting patrons, and he was in no mood to be trifled with that day. For about five minutes, the attendant/actor tried to get Grampy to say something, anything good about Super Shell. All Grampy had to say was, "I buy it because it's got a higher octane. Now, would you get off my ear?!!" Finally, after minutes of frustration, he said in total exasperation, "It's fabulous! Fabulous! Just fabulous!...Now would you get off my ear?!!!" Shell took his "Fabulous! Just fabulous!" and put it on a national commercial for which Grampy got paid small royalties every time it aired!!!

I love hearing people talk about my Grampy. They remember him as a fun-loving man with a BIG personality, who had a nickname for everyone. They remember him wearing brightly colored Pucci print and Lilly Pulitzer pants on the golf course. I remarked to my mom that it is so amazing that people still tell stories about him as if they just occured yesterday, and Grampy died 20 years ago.

I, too, remember him in vivid, living color. And I'm grateful to be part of a legacy of people who live life just that way....

I miss you, Grampy!

With love,

Your little princess

Birthday Fun!

My birthday was this weekend, and it was so much fun! On Friday, when I got to work, my cubicle was decorated with purple and lavender streamers. I felt like a birthday princess in my purple birthday castle! ;)


And just in case we didn't already know that eSuitor is the most wonderful guy in the world, look what he sent me....

I am one happy girl!!!

New York City--The Best Love/Hate Relationship I Ever Had!

My best friend just moved there. My mom is currently on vacation there. And I once called it home!

The Big Apple.

I lived there for three years in the late '90s. I look back on those as some of the best years of my life. I went to acting school there, booked my first acting jobs there, and made some wonderful friends there. It was a wonderful place to live, and one of the hardest places to live as well.

New York is a city of paradoxes:

So many people, yet oh so lonely.
A concrete jungle, with the most beautiful and enormous park!
Rapid transit that sometimes takes forever.

There are so many things I could write about my relationship with Manhattan, but the one that strikes me the most is how "the city" helped me know myself more deeply and truly. New York pushed me to my personal limits. For perhaps the first time in my life, I found my edges, so to speak. It is a city that requires a person to live under a lot of pressure, a constant rat race. It is a city where the best of everyone is competing in their given field. It requires your soul to find a way to thrive without being refreshed by nature. You learn how to sleep with constant noise outside your window. You learn how to function as an individual in a sea of strangers. In a nutshell, you find out who you are. What you can handle. What you can't.

I remember toward the end of my last year in NYC, I had been away from the city doing a tour of The Wizard of Oz. As I was coming back into Manhattan and saw the skyline--the skyline that typically thrilled me--I wasn't thrilled at all. I didn't want to come back. I knew it was time to go. The city taught me that, as well.

New York will always have a special place in my heart. Probably because I got to know myself a lot better there. Though I may never live there again, I will return to the city for visits throughout the rest of my life. And God willing, I hope I will have the opportunity to perform on one of Broadway's stages.

Things You May Not Have Known About Me

Four jobs I have had in my life:
1.) Waitress
2.) Actress
3.) Peer counselor
4.) Compliance specialist

Four movies I can watch over and over:
1.) The Sound of Music
2.) Sense and Sensibility
3.) Bridget Jones' Diary
4.) Legally Blonde

Four TV Shows I Love to Watch
1.) Grey's Anatomy
2.) Will & Grace
3.) Friends
4.) Big Brother

Four of my favorite foods:
1.) Anything Tex-Mex
2.) Chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream
3.) Pizza
4.) Cheesecake

Four places I would like to be right now:
1.) New York City
2.) On a stage somewhere
3.) Zaragoza, Spain
4.) Hanging out with my man

"Okay, Tracy, when I say 'Standby' you're going to make a farting noise!"

Tonight, I went to my commercial acting class. One of the exercises we did was a group commercial audition scenario. It was for the game Scruples. There were six of us gathered around a card table playing the game. We had to create the illusion of a party atmosphere...lots of laughter. The scene had to start with a big burst of laughter. So when we were out in the hall rehearsing, I gave an off-the-cuff one-liner: "So she she called me into her office, and she farted!" (Insert group laughter here.) My teacher overheard us rehearsing, and thought it was funny. When we went back into the classroom to do our mock audition, we took about eight takes or so. Each one of the takes had to begin with a burst of group laughter. Before each and every take, the teacher said, "Okay, Tracy, when I say 'Standby', make a farting noise!"

Just another day in acting class!

Photos from Texas

Saturday morning at my Dad's place. He lives out in the country. This is my sister and me wading in the creek with Dad's dog Bo-bo.

Dad and me. A few weeks ago, I wrote about my Dad's good news after receiving an optimistic prognosis after finishing his treatments for cancer. My Dad could really use your prayers. He just discovered three new tumors. This is very discouraging news on the heels of such great news. Please pray with me for his complete healing.

On Saturday night, eSuitor and I went country dancing with my sis, bro-in-law, and my friend W. Doesn't eSuitor look so Urban Cowboy in his black t-shirt? Mama like!

It may look like eSuitor and I are sharing a romantic cuddle in the hammock, but we are cracking up because as soon as we both got on, it broke--yep, that's us on the ground!

I’m Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

Did you miss me? :)

eSuitor and I took a trip home to the Lone Star State for a visit with the family from Friday to Monday. It was the first time for anyone in my family to meet him. We had a great time and everyone loved him!

We spent Friday and Saturday with my Dad. My sis and bro-in-law hung out with us, too. My Dad lives WAY out in the country on a ranch. It was so beautiful to look up and see the stars sparkling like diamonds in the night sky. We rode around on my Dad’s 4-wheeler, ate delicious barbecue, and enjoyed the swimming pool.

Saturday afternoon, we drove from my Dad’s place to my hometown and went country-western dancing that night. My man knows how to boot-scoot! So much fun! The dance hall also had a karaoke room, so you know I had to sing my signature song, “Son of a Preacher Man”. eSuitor said he felt proud that I was his girlfriend when I was up there singing. MAJOR BROWNIE POINTS!!! ;)

Sunday, we went to church where he met a lot of my friends. After church, we went out for lunch with my mom, sis, and bro-in-law. Mom treated us to a scrumptious brunch, and it was fun to be all together. Sunday evening, we had a cookout/party where more friends and family convened to size up the man! ;) He was a real trooper, and so far all feedback from the Texas contingency has been positive.

Monday, we relaxed, ate Tex-Mex, hung out with the fam, and then got on the plane to come home. It made my heart melt a little when we collapsed into our seats and he told me what a great time he had. Then he said, “I love you” and I dozed off with my head on his shoulder, exhausted from the weekend, with a big smile on my face. :)

Reflecting on “Play”

On Saturday, after spending a couple of hours in and out of the ocean water, I found myself exhausted. It was the kind of exhaustion I felt as a child after playing for hours outside, trying my hardest to squeeze in as much play time as possible before it got dark. I was so busy having fun, I didn’t realize I was getting exercise. I hadn’t played hard like that for way too long!

What happened? Why do we stop having recess after the 5th grade? Do we become too mature to play? Are we so starved for play time that we pay gobs of money for gym memberships just to put ourselves on treadmills to run like hamsters on a wheel for 30 minutes just to make ourselves sweat?

Somehow, I feel like I’ve taken a wrong turn.

I wake up and sit in my car on my way to work where I sit in a chair staring at my computer screen for the next eight hours. Then I sit in my car to drive home. I sit at a table for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. And I sit on my couch to relax after work. Lots and lots of sitting.

Okay, I often walk for about a half hour in the evening, which is good exercise. But it’s just not the same as running through a playground or a backyard, climbing on monkey bars or up trees, chasing our friends in winded games of ‘tag’.

Mommy, I want recess.

Proof that my Roommate is Good Peeps

She has embraced my ridiculous (yet FUN!) way of turning nearly every word into silliness. This was our conversation this evening.

Me: Roomie-doodle?

Roomie: Walkie-poo?

Me: Yes-ee-doo!!!

Do you need a translation?

Me: Hey Roomie!

Roomie: You want to go take a walk, don't you?

Me: Yes! How did you know?!!!

Saturday in Pictures...

Saturday, eSuitor and I had so much fun! The temperatures in Southern California are so HOT right now (101 degrees yesterday), that the only place we could think of to be was in the ice cold Pacific Ocean! So we boogie boarded again, and this time eSuitor got to surf! There are captions above every picture, but it may take a moment for them to appear as you scroll down the posting. Enjoy!

Here's a picture of yours truly with my boogie board.

And here's a picture of my man with his board!

Boogie boarding is fun!

Cowabunga! eSuitor's catching a wave!

After the beach, we got cleaned up and put on our fancy clothes to go out for a night on the town! We went to an Indian restaurant for dinner and then to The Pasadena Playhouse to see a show called The Last Five Years. I had been wanting to see it since I first heard about it a couple of years ago. Our seats were in the second row, and it a lovely evening.

Acrostics

Father
Above
In
The
Heart

Happiness
Of
Possible
Encounter

Luxurious
Of course!
Valuable
Everlasting

The Couch Potato Meme

I got this from Ally Bean. Here’s what you do. Using this list of television shows, bold the shows that you’ve seen at least three episodes of.

24
30 Something
7th Heaven
Adam-12
Alfred Hitchcock Presents
Alias
Angel
Arrested Development
Battlestar Galactica
Baywatch
Beverly Hills 90210
Bonanza
Boy Meets World
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Bug Juice
Chappelle’s Show
Charlie’s Angels
Charmed
Cheers
Columbo
Commander in Chief
CSI: Miami
CSI: NY
Curb Your Enthusiasm
Dawson’s Creek
Dead Like Me
Deadwood
Degrassi: The Next Generation
Designing Women
Desperate Housewives
Doctor Who
Eastenders
Entourage
ER
Everwood
Extras
Family Guy
Farscape
Father Ted
Fawlty Towers
Felicity
Firefly
Frasier
Friends
Futurama
Get Smart
Gilligan’s Island
Gilmore Girls
Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C.
Grey’s Anatomy
Gunsmoke
Hannah Montana
Happy Days
Hill Street Blues
Hogan’s Heroes
Home and Away
Home Improvement
Homicide: Life on the Street
House, M.D.
I Dream of Jeannie
I Love Lucy
Inuyasha
Invader Zim
Invasion
JAG
Jackass
Joey
Keen Eddie
Little House on the Prairie
Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman
Lost
Lost in Space
Love, American Style
M*A*S*H
MacGyver
Mad About You
Malcolm in the Middle
Married… With Children
Medium
Melrose Place
Miami Vice
Mission: Impossible
Monk
Murphy Brown
My Name Is Earl
My Three Sons
My Two Dads
NCIS
Neighbours
Nip/Tuck
Northern Exposure
Numb3rs
NYPD Blue
Only Fools and Horses
Oz
Perry Mason
Pokemon
Power Rangers
Prison Break
Rescue Me
Roseanne
Roswell
Saved by the Bell
Sisters
Scooby-Doo, Where Are You?
Scrubs
Seinfeld
Sex and the City
Six Feet Under
Smallville
So Weird
South Park
Spongebob Squarepants
Starsky and Hutch
Star TrekStar Trek: The Next Generation
Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Star Trek: Voyager
Stargate Atlantis
Stargate SG-1
Superman
Supernatural
Surface
Taxi
That 70’s Show
That’s So Raven
The 4400
The Addams Family
The Andy Griffith Show
The A-Team
The Avengers
The Beverly Hillbillies
The Bob Newhart Show [the first
The Brone with Emily and Carol]

The Bob Newhart Show [the second one with Larry, Daryl and Daryl]

The Brady Bunch

The Cosby Show
The Daily Show
The Dead Zone
The Flintstones
The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
The Good Life
The Honeymooners
The Jetsons
The Love Boat
The Mary Tyler Moore Show
The Munsters
The O.C.
The Office
The Shield
The Simpsons
The Six Million Dollar Man
The Sopranos
The Suite Life of Zack and Cody
The Twilight Zone
The Waltons
The West Wing
The Wonder Years
The X-Files
Third Watch
Three’s Company
Titus
Twin Peaks
Veronica Mars
Weeds
Whose Line is it Anyway?
Will and Grace
Wings

I Love My Parents!

In a couple weeks, eSuitor and I are making a trip home to Texas for him to meet the family. Yesterday morning, on my way to work, my Mom called and told me that she's so excited to see me, she can hardly stand it. Then, I received an e-mail later in the day at work from my Dad telling me that he has already planned the menu for our meals when we come. It is so wonderful to be so loved by my parents.

I love you, too!

I love to Boogie!

I had so much fun this weekend! On Saturday, eSuitor and I rented boogie boards and went to Huntington Beach to catch some waves. It was my first time to immerse myself in the Pacific Ocean, and all I can say is "hooray for wetsuits!". That water is chilly!!! And the waves are so strong. The first big one that rolled in totally knocked me over--the ponytail that looked so cute when I went into the water was knocked completely off kilter by one wave! Do the waves have no respect for the look I was going for??? ;) (This photo is not of us, but it gives you the idea.)

It took me a little while to get the timing of catching a wave, but once I got it down--SO MUCH FUN!!! It's like riding a rollercoaster! The wave just comes underneath you and carries you. It's like flying! Sometimes, it just kept going and going and took me almost all the way into shore. It was a blast, and kind of addicting. Once you catch a good wave, you want to go out and get another.

eSuitor is a surfer, and I suspect that Saturday's boogie adventure was part of a greater scheme to get me on a surf board. Kinda breaking me in easy. We'll have to see on that one...one step at a time. Poco a poco, as they say in Spain. I don't know if I'll be a surfer girl, but I definitely love to boogie!

Siesta!

Today after work, I came home and read a little bit. Before I knew it my eyes were heavy, and I knew...I needed a nap. I closed my eyes and woke up an hour and a half later feeling refreshed.

I love naps!

My senior year in college, I read a fun book called Inspiration Sandwich by SARK. SARK (an acronym for Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy) is an artist, and her book shares how she lives her creative life. While I don't necessarily embrace the worldview of the author, I truly enjoyed the book. When I read it, I felt unexpectedly liberated. As a budding artist myself, I knew that I was marching to a slightly different beat than those around me, and reading her book helped me feel much better about my own inner rhythm. I know that sounds way artsy, but I guess that's the point. The book helped me to embrace my artsiness, and accept myself more wholly.

Inspiration Sandwich endorses napping...whenever you feel like it! SARK believes that napping feeds her creativity. And it made me feel, for the first time, like napping wasn't being lazy. Instead, it was a way I could care for my creative spirit--and being caring feels much better than being lazy.

Hooray for the Red, White, and Blue! (And love, too!)

Yesterday was a really good day!

eSuitor and I went to the beach together in the morning. We thought we'd encounter hoards of people, but not so. Driving was surreal. It was as if we owned the streets of L.A. Hardly any traffic. No problem parking at the beach. We plopped ourselves down on our beach towels and enjoyed a few hours in the sun. The weather was gorgeous. Warm sun, cool breeze. We read books, took a walk along the shoreline, and had a picnic lunch that he prepared! It was nice just being together.

In the late afternoon, we met his cousins for another picnic (dinner, this time) at a park next to Dodger Stadium and then we went to the game--my first Dodgers game! His cousins have season tickets. Their seats are amazing--in a balcony right behind home plate. Wanna see a picture of eSuitor? :)

The pregame "show" was awesome. A woman with a great country voice sang the national anthem. And just as the song ended, a USAF jet did a fly-over. It was such an emotion-filled moment. Something out of an old movie! As the jet approached and passed overhead, we were joyfully waving our little American flags in our hands, as if to say "hello" and "thank you" to the pilot!

After the plane passed over, I looked at the strangers in the seats around me. We were saying things like, "That was amazing!" as we wiped tears from our eyes. In a day and age when so many people are disenchanted with our government, it was wonderful to feel the strength of patriotism pulsing through the crowd and resonating in my heart. We are blessed to live in this great nation! Thank You, Lord!

After the game, we were treated to a beautiful fireworks display. You might think that was the big finale of the evening, but it wasn't. eSuitor totally outdid the fireworks when were saying good-bye--he kissed me goodnight and said, "I love you".

Of course, you already know that I love him too, but it was fun to get to tell him myself!

Needless to say, I drifted off to sleep with a big smile on my face, and it was still there when I woke up this morning!

Happy Holiday News!

It is always fun to get a personal e-mail at work. A little news from the "outside" is such a ray of sunshine during a busy day at the office. I got a HUGE burst of sunshine when I got the below e-mail from my Dad on Friday. With his permission, please read what he sent me! This e-mail was sent to my aunt, cousins, sister and me.

Greetings To All:

This is my holiday update. I visited the oncologist Wednesday and he was very favorable as to the therapy success. He said “I have added years to my life.” He sees no rush to do the PET/CT Scan right away and would like to let it keep working in me until the first of August which is fine with me. There will not be any further treatments. So the next step is to have the port catheter removed and excise a couple lingering nodules. My regular surgeon will perform that task in day surgery next Wednesday July 5, 2006.

Enjoy the holiday. I will work tomorrow half day and then hit miserable golf shots at my personal driving range down at the barn.

Love to all,

Father, Brother, & Uncle D.

I am so thankful for and happy about this great news! Praise God who is answering our prayers! Thank you for praying for my Dad. I'll continue to give you updates.

Happy, happy Independence Day!

Caring about Couture

In an effort to beat the heat today, my roommate and I decided to abandon our 88 degree apartment and find respite for two hours in a movie theatre. What with being chicks and all, we opted for a chick-flick--The Devil Wears Prada. (For those of you who haven't seen it yet, don't worry, I'm not going to give anything away.) It was a fun summer movie about a girl named Andy played by Anne Hathaway who goes to work at a fashion magazine to be assistant to an icy-cold ice queen played by Meryl Streep.

Streep is an absolute delight to watch. She is such a chameleon actress. Every character she plays is distinct and unique. Hathaway is winning as a recent college graduate with big dreams of becoming a journalist. Her detour into the world of fashion is what made the movie fun for me. She gets to wear the most beautiful designer clothes. The movie made me want to go spend money I don't have on gorgeous couture. Gucci handbags. Jimmy Choo stillettos.

By far the best monologue in the movie is delivered by Streep about how the color cerulean came to be part of American fashion in the year 2002. She really made me care about couture.

That's right people...I have found my inner fashionista and she's ready to go shopping! Wanna come?